Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz Quotes Page 12 of 38

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Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: When I went by the office they gave me coffee and cookies and no one peed on me. I miss that so much.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Oh, good, you're here. There's (clears throat) something I want to talk to you about.
Bernadette: We're not putting a TV in the bathroom. That's how you get hemorrhoids.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: Gerald, what's going on? Hope you're not screwing up my research. You calling from a bike ride? 'Cause you're backpedaling hard.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: Howard, we both know you can't keep up this pace. By this afternoon you're gonna be passed out on the couch and I'm gonna have three exhausted babies to deal with.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Uh, I was thinking maybe one of us should stay home full-time, with the kids.
Bernadette: Oh great, so I have to give up my job and everything I've worked for?
Howard: Actually, I was thinking I should stay home.
Bernadette: Oh, so I have to abandon my children and go back to work, while you get to stay home and bond with them?
Howard: You just said you didn't want to.
Bernadette: No, I don't want to have to, but if I want to, I should get to.
Howard: Do you want to?
Bernadette: Maybe I do.
Howard: What if I also want to?
Bernadette: Well, I don't know, we can't both stay home.
Howard: Don't you think you should go back to work, because you make more money?
Bernadette: Don't you think you should make more money?
Howard: I think it's pretty sexist of you to say a dad can't stay home with his children.
Bernadette: You know what else is sexist, the phrase "suck it", yet here we are.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: Howie? Howie, wake up. It's time.
Howard: Oh. Did your water break?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Are you feeling any contractions?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: Wait. Well, where are you going?
Bernadette: To the hospital. Today's my due date, and this crap needs to end now.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: What are you doing?
Howard: I'm making the situation better with humor.
Bernadette: Are you?
Howard: Would you rather me make it better with magic?
Bernadette: Go back to sleep.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Penny: Okay, we go down and back up. ... And back up!
Bernadette: Yeah, hearing you is not the problem.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Penny: Okay, we're gonna start with some nice breathing exercises. (inhales, exhales)
Bernadette: Sorry. I can't think of anything except how flat your belly is.
Penny: Oh, thank you.
Bernadette: Go put on some more clothes, you bitch.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Penny: You know, when my yoga instructor was pregnant, she told me there are tons of poses that put her right into labor.
Bernadette: I'll try, but I feel like bendy poses are what got me into this mess.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: Come on, baby. Get out here right now and I'll buy you a pony.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Howard: Michael? Really, you think we're naming him Michael?
Bernadette: Not now, Howard. I'm in the middle of a game.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Howard: [entering the kitchen] I can't believe you're trying to hijack our son's name. [looking for Bernadette] Bernie?
Bernadette: This is as fast as I move! Calm down!

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Bernadette: What's wrong with Michael? It's my dad's name.
Howard: I don't want to name our son after your father.
Bernadette: I didn't want to say this, but he's dying.
Howard: He is?
Bernadette: Eventually. I mean, you see the way the man eats.
Howard: Okay, is this the hormones, or have you always been a lunatic?
Bernadette: I don't even know anymore.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Howard: So you're just gonna name him Michael? Were you even gonna tell me?
Bernadette: I told you.
Howard: When?
Bernadette: Oh, right. That was Amy.

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