Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 1 of 33

Searching Search quotes

Showing quotes 1 to 15 of 493Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Quote from the episode The Graduation Transmission

Leonard: My point is, while you're spending all this time on your own, building computers or practising your cello, what you're really doing is becoming interesting. When people finally do notice you, they're gonna find someone a lot cooler than they thought. And for those of you that were popular in high school, it's over, sorry. Thank you. Congratulations.

Quote from the episode The Matrimonial Momentum

Leonard: Penny. We are made of particles that have existed since the moment began. I like to think those atoms traveled fourteen billion years through time and space to create us, so that we could be together and make each other whole.

Quote from the episode The Graduation Transmission

Leonard: So, for the remainder of my speech, this is for the invisible kids. Maybe you never fit in. Or maybe you were the smallest kid in the school. Or the heaviest. Or the weirdest. Maybe you're graduating and you still haven't even had your first kiss. By the way, nineteen, and Geraldine Coco, wherever you are, thank you. Maybe you don't have any friends, and guess what, that's okay. While all the popular kids are off doing whatever - I don't know what they're doing because I was never there.

Quote from the episode The Desperation Emanation

Leonard: What would you be if you were attached to another object by an inclined plane, wrapped helically around an axis?
Sheldon: Screwed.
Leonard: There you go.

Quote from the episode The Champagne Reflection

Leonard: You know what, this bottle was meant to celebrate an achievement. Let's make a pact. When one of us gets their first big breakthrough, we'll celebrate by opening this bottle and toasting Professor Abbott.
Howard: I love that.
Raj: Me too.
Leonard: Then, of course, rubbing our success in Sheldon's face.
Howard: Well that's the best part.

Quote from the episode The Romance Resonance

Leonard: People get things they don't deserve all the time. Like me with you.

Quote from the episode The Griffin Equivalency

Leonard: We're here to see Koothrappali, not kill Batman.

Quote from the episode The Proton Displacement

Professor Proton: Can I ask you a question?
Leonard: Yeah, sure.
Professor Proton: Why do you put up with Sheldon?
Leonard: Oh, you know because we're friends.
Professor Proton: Why?
Leonard: Wow, you ask really hard questions. Look, I know he can be aggravating, but what you have to remember is he's not doing it on purpose, it's just how he is. But he's also loyal and trustworthy and we have fun together.
Professor Proton: You know you're describing a dog?
Leonard: He did bite me once. But in his defense, I came up behind him while he was eating.
Professor Proton: They hate that.
Leonard: Sheldon is the smartest person I have met. He's a little broken and he needs me. And I guess I need him too.
Professor Proton: Why is that?
Leonard: Boy, you will not let this go, will you?

Quote from the episode The Table Polarization

Sheldon: I've changed. Like the frog who's put in a pot of water that's heated so gradually, he doesn't realize he's boiling to death.
Penny: Or you're the frog who's been kissed by the princess and turned into a prince.
Leonard: Or you're just a tall, annoying frog.

Quote from the episode The Toast Derivation

Wolowitz: Raj, did you ever tell your sister about the time Sheldon got punched by Bill Gates?
Priya: Oh, God, you're kidding.
Raj: No, Gates gave a speech at the university. Sheldon went up to him afterwards and said, "Maybe if you weren't so distracted by sick children in Africa you could have put a little more thought into Windows Vista."
Leonard: Bam, right in the nose. Made me proud to own a PC.

Quote from the episode The Hot Troll Deviation

Leonard: Sometimes your movements are so lifelike I forget you are not a real boy.

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Sheldon: *knock knock knock* Leonard? (x3)
Leonard: What Sheldon! What Sheldon! What Sheldon!
Sheldon: Tell me what you see here.
Leonard: The blunt instrument that will be the focus of my murder trial?

Quote from the episode The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification

Sheldon: At my age do you know how I'm statistically most likely to die?
Leonard: At the hands of your room mate?
Sheldon: An accident.
Leonard: That's how I'm going to make it look.

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Wolowitz (watching America's Next Top Model): Oh, look! That's the future Mrs. Wolowitz. No, wait! That's the future Mrs. Wolowitz. With her head in the lap of... what a coincidence... it's the future Mrs. Wolowitz.
Leonard: Yeah, and they can all move in with you and your mother. The current Mrs. Wolowitz.

Quote from the episode The Einstein Approximation

Leonard: Penny, I told you if you don't put him in his crate at night, he just runs around the apartment.

Showing quotes 1 to 15 of 493Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Submit Quotes