Leonard: I play Grand Theft Auto. I know about gats. *gun fires*

Leonard: Can you be more specific on how my eyebrows are "stupid"? No, never mind. It's right here.

Penny: Hey, you guys want to play a drinking game?
Sheldon: Oh, well now, we'll never win. You always play the drinking game.
Penny: Not the drinking game, a drinking game.
Leonard: To be fair, good at both.

Leonard: Ahh, Sheldon's texting me to drive him to Bernadette's.
Penny: Well, what are you gonna say?
Leonard: Well, they did just introduce the middle finger emoji. If it's not for this, I don't know what it's for.

Leonard: Pardon me, Sheldon, but how many reels until the protagonist gets to his point?

Sheldon: I spoke with Leonard's mother, and she made me feel better.
Leonard: I don't know who you talked to, but that wasn't my mother.

Leonard: Why are you pretending to be outdoors? You hate it.
Sheldon: Oh, Amy showed me a compelling study that demonstrated the cognitive benefit of spending time in the wilderness.
Leonard: Buddy, I am ready to drive you into the wilderness any time you want and leave you there.

Guy #2: Is she just with you because you're rich?
Leonard: She makes more money than I do!

Sheldon: Well, cell service is down to one bar, so if anyone needs medical attention or to tell a stranger their political views are stupid, now's the time.
Amy: Have you ever been off the grid before?
Sheldon: Once. The battery ran out on my phone. I had to wait for my iPad to turn on.
Leonard: I was afraid he was gonna eat me.

Leonard: Penny says they're having fun working on the prototype.
Howard: Remember when her fun was nightclubs and drinking games?
Leonard: I know. I'm lowering the bar so slowly. This time next year she'll have a coin collection.

Cinema Worker: Excuse me. You guys interested in a free screening of an upcoming movie?
Leonard: Oh. Sorry, we can't.
Howard: Well, hang on. What movie is it?
Cinema Worker: Oh, I can't tell you. But it does star Will Smith.
Howard: Wait. I bet it's Suicide Squad. Let's check it out.
Leonard: What about the girls?
Howard: Penny just said they're having fun. Honestly, you want to wrap tape around a bunch of pipe fittings all afternoon?
Leonard: Okay, we'll take 'em. But, I swear, if it's Will Smith in Shark Tale 2, it better be at least as good as the original.

Penny: Maybe there's something in the book that will help.
Leonard: Worth a shot.
Penny: Okay. Let's see, let's see. "Biting other children"?
Leonard: Well, sometimes, but problem for another day.

Penny: Hey, let's light a fire.
Amy: Ooh, that sounds cozy.
Leonard: I don't think I've lit a real fire before.
Sheldon: Ah, it's basic thermodynamics. I'm sure we can figure that out.
Leonard: I could stack the logs conically to facilitate airflow.
Sheldon: That would maximize oxygen for optimal combustion.
Leonard: Right. So all we need is to...
Penny: Got it.
Leonard: A scientist made that.

Sheldon: Oh, Meemaw got a new set of teeth. Oh, but then she found her old ones. Oh, so now the new ones are just gonna be her church teeth.
Leonard: Fun. Like your Comic-Con Spock ears and your around the house Spock ears.

Stuart: Okay, how about we flip a coin?
Leonard: Look, hang on. Doesn't this girl get a word in all of this? And isn't that word "no"?