Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 44 of 82

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Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Leslie Winkle: What do you think?
Leonard: You proposed the experiment, I think you should present your findings first.
Leslie Winkle: Fair enough. On the plus side, it was a good kiss, reasonable technique, no extraneous spittle. On the other hand, no arousal.
Leonard: None?
Leslie Winkle: None.
Leonard: Ah. Well, thank you for your time.
Leslie Winkle: Thank you.

Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Sheldon: Oh, I hope that scratching post is for you.
Leonard: I know what you're thinking. I've taken your asthma into account. There's a feline geneticist in San Diego who has developed the cutest little hypo-allergenic calicos.
Sheldon: Leonard, listen to me.
Leonard: I've been thinking about names. I'm kind of torn between Einstein, Newton and Sergeant Fuzzyboots.

Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Penny: So are the rest of the guys meeting us here?
Leonard: Oh, yeah, no. Turns out that Raj and Howard had to work, and Sheldon had a colonoscopy and he hasn't quite bounced back yet.
Penny: Ooh, my uncle just had a colonoscopy.
Leonard: You're kidding. Well, then, that's something we have in common.
Penny: How?
Leonard: We both have people in our lives who ... want to nip intestinal polyps in the bud.

Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Penny: Okay, well, you know, it's just me. I'm still getting over this break-up with Kurt, and this thing with Doug would be just rebound sex.
Leonard: Ugh, don't get me started on rebound sex.
Penny: It's just, it's my pattern. I break up, then I find some cute guy, and then it's just thirty six meaningless of ... well, you know.
Leonard: I'm not sure that I do. Um, is that one thirty-six hour experience, or is it thirty six hours spread out over say, one ... glorious summer.
Penny: No, it's usually over a weekend, and trust me, you do not feel good after it.
Leonard: Well, chafing, right?
Penny: Emotionally.
Leonard: Of course, yeah, emotional chafing.

Quote from the episode The Irish Pub Formulation

Raj: Hey, so what did you guys think of the new episode of Caprica last night?
Leonard: I didn't see it.
Howard: Didn't see it? What were you doing?
Leonard: Uh, I was out.
Raj: On Caprica night?
Leonard: Yeah, I, uh, went for a drink.
Howard: Really, you, and where, where did you go?
Leonard: To, uh, Lucky Baldwin's.
Sheldon: Oh, I've heard of that place. Isn't that Pasadena's favorite Irish watering hole?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Did you meet anyone interesting there, perhaps a promiscuous redheaded barmaid?
Leonard: As a matter of fact I-I-I can't. I can't. I can't do it.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Penny: When did you pick out our kids' names?
Leonard: Remember that day you moved into the building?
Penny: (chuckles) Yes.
Leonard: A non-creepy amount of time after that.

Quote from the episode The Matrimonial Metric

Leonard: Did Sheldon and Amy give you guys that puzzle, too?
Howard: Yeah. Is it just me or have they been acting strange?
Leonard: I don't think they're acting.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Sheldon: Why did you lie to me?
Leonard: I don't know. It just seemed funny at first and then the longer it went on, funnier it got.

Quote from the episode The Classified Materials Turbulence

Leonard: Hey, Stuart, I need to talk to you.
Stuart: Sure, what's up?
Leonard: I think I gave you bad advice about Penny, and I want to apologize.
Stuart: No, your advice was great.
Leonard: It was?
Stuart: Yeah, going slow really worked.
Leonard: You're kidding. Never worked for me.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Leonard: Okay, I'm really uncomfortable with him back in that room.
Penny: Why? He hasn't made a peep all day.
Leonard: You don't get it. All the years that we lived together, he drove me crazy the whole time.
Penny: And now he's not.
Leonard: Exactly. Don't look at me like that. It-it-it means he did it on purpose. It was a choice. That-That's like finding out Godzilla could've had Arby's instead of Tokyo.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Leonard: Sheldon!
Sheldon: I'm sorry. Am I being too loud?
Leonard: No, you're being perfect and you know it.
Sheldon: Would you like me to be a less considerate tenant?
Leonard: No. Yes. What? Stop messing with me!

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Penny: Hey, how'd it go?
Leonard: Well, apparently he's not leaving and I have to go get him sparkling water.
Penny: Why are you smiling?
Leonard: I don't know. It just feels right.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Bernadette: So, does Penny know you based a character on her?
Leonard: What character?
Bernadette: Ilsa, the head of the institute. That's clearly Penny.
Leonard: No, it's not.
Bernadette: Really? Confident, ball-busting beauty who's always rolling her eyes at Logan?
Leonard: Trust me, that describes more women than you think.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Sheldon: Yeah, not to brag, but Amy's last birthday brought my coital tally up to four.
Leonard: Whatever you're doing, it's not bragging.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Amy: I've always liked the name Elliott.
Leonard: Sorry, can't have it. That's my boy name.
Amy: I said it first.
Leonard: It's not like calling dibs.
Amy: Yes, it is. It's exactly like that. Dibs on Elliott.
Leonard: I'm just saying, we might get there first. You only have sex once a year. I'll probably have sex tonight. [Penny looks at Leonard] Fine, you can have Elliott.

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