Penny Quotes Page 1 of 9

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Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your ken can kiss my barbie.

4.8

Quote from the episode The First Pitch Insufficiency

Sheldon: Ignore them, Amy. They're just jealous because they'll never have a relationship as good as ours.
Penny: Isn't this when he says "bazooka" or something?

4.8

Quote from the episode The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition

(Sheldon knocks on Penny's door three times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny. '(Knocks 3 times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny. (Knocks 3 times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny.

4.7

Quote from the episode The Locomotion Interruption

Leonard: You wanna come to Arizona with me?
Penny: I can't I have that job interview.
Leonard: Oh, right.
Penny: Besides, I don't need six hours of "Your hair is different. Why did you change your hair? I'm holding my breath until your hair grows back."

4.7

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Sheldon: This is banana bread.
Penny: This is a door knob.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Cushion Saturation

*Wolowitz checks his Caller ID*.
Wolowitz: Ooh, looks like I'm gonna have sex tonight. (answers) Hey, baby...
Penny: His right hand is calling him?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution

(Penny talking to Sheldon & Howard at the Cheesecake Factory Bar.)
Penny: Hey, what you guys doing here?
Howard: We're grown men we drink at bars.
Penny: No and no.
(to Howard) Everything okay with you and Bernadette?
Howard: Oh yeah, SURE.
Penny: (to Sheldon) You and Amy? Good?
Sheldon: Oh, better than good.
Penny: You know those girls text me every detail of their lives as it happens?
Howard: I'm not signing a pre-nup.
Penny: All right Howard Wolowitz listen up! You sign anything she puts in front of you. Because you are the luckiest man alive if you let her go there is NO way you can find anyone else. Speaking on behalf of all women, it's not going to happen - we had a meeting.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Itchy Brain Simulation

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, Sheldon wins.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Penny: Give my friend his stuff back.
Tod Zarnecki: I don't know what you're talking about.
Penny: Well then good news. Today's the day a girl's finally going to touch you in your little special place. *Kicks him in the groin*

4.6

Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Leonard: Once you open the box it loses its value.
Penny: Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. I gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Cooper Extraction

Raj: (To Amy) If you were having Sheldon's baby, would you really want him in the room?
Penny: If he's in the room when they're making the baby, I'll give you $10.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Penny: So that means, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor and, Howard, you know a lot of doctors.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Adhesive Duck Deficiency

Sheldon: Now remember, you were given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxer, so don't operate heavy machinery, and try not to choke on your own drool.
*Sheldon is is about to leave.*
Penny: Wait! You have to help me get into bed. (laughs) "Sheldon has to help me get into bed". Bet you thought I'd never say that!
Sheldon: Yes. Charmed. Your drug-addled candour knows no bounds.
*Sheldon follows her to her room after shutting the door. He pulls down the covers to help Penny into bed.*
Penny: You know people think you are this weird robot man who's so annoying all the time and you totally are. But then it's like that movie Wall-E at the end. You're so full of love and you can save a plant and get fat people out of their floaty chairs.
Sheldon: That's a fairly laboured metaphor but I appreciate the sentiment behind it.
Penny: Sing 'Soft Kitty' to me.
Sheldon: 'Soft kitty' is for when you're sick, you're not sick.
Penny: Injured and drugged is a kind of sick.
Sheldon: (sitting on the bed next to her) Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...
Penny: Wait wait. Lets sing it as a round. I'll start. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur... *Sheldon doesn't join in.*
Penny: So that is when you come in. I'll start over. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur... Still nothing from Sheldon.
Penny: I've got all night Sheldon. *She starts again.*
Penny: Soft Kitty, warm kitty...
Sheldon: Soft Kitty, warm kitty... *They both sing the entire song together.*

4.6

Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment

Leonard: What got into him?
Penny: Oh, a couple of virgin Cuba Libres who turned out to be a little slutty.
Leonard: You didn't.
Penny: You do your little experiments, I do mine.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Gothowitz Deviation

Leonard: They're gonna get beaten up at that club.
Penny: They're gonna get beaten up at Walgreens.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation

Leonard: More Halloween candy. I thought you already bought some.
Penny: Yeah, that's gone. It's a bad month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Penny: And what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox

Leonard: Wow Penny, you're on fire!
Penny:Yeah, so is Sheldon!

4.6

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Penny: No Shirt, No Shoes, No Sheldon.
Howard: I bet we could sell that sign all over Pasadena!

4.6

Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox

Penny: Wait. Wait, Sheldon come back, you forgot something.
Sheldon: What?
Penny: This plasma grenade. Ha look, it's raining you!

4.6

Quote from the episode The Infestation Hypothesis

Penny: (Answering the door to Sheldon) What's up, buttercup?
Penny: (Answering the door again) What's the word, hummingbird?
Penny: (And again) What's the gist, physicist?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution

Penny: So you're saying if I became a famous movie star, we got married, you wouldn't sign a pre-nup?
Leonard: Absolutely not! If I'm gonna be stuck at home with the kids while you're on location cheating on me with Ryan Gosling ... then Leonard gots to get paid.

4.6

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Sheldon: I would ask you to find some way to suppress your libido.
Penny: I could think about you.
Sheldon: Whatever works.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Benefactor Factor

Penny: Good morning, slut!
Leonard: What?
Penny: Oh, please! I recognise the walk of shame when I see it. All you're missing is a little smeared mascara and a purse with panties wadded up in it!

4.6

Quote from the episode The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

Penny: They aren't like other guys. They're special.
Alicia: Okay, they're special and?
Penny: Well let's see how can I explain this. Um. They don't know how to use their shields.
Alicia: Shields?
Penny: Yeah. You know like in Star Trek and you're in battle, and you raise the shields.
*Realizing what she said* Where the hell did that come from?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Boyfriend Complexity

*Leonard is kissing Penny, and Penny's dad enters*
Penny: Come on, honey, not in front of my dad.
Penny's dad: Relax, I've seen her do a lot worse with a lot stupider.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Terminator Decoupling

Penny: Whassup Moonpie?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Gorilla Dissolution

Leonard: So is that it? Are we engaged?
Penny: Yeah, I think so.
Leonard: All right.
Penny: What's wrong?
Leonard: I'm not sure. It just feels a little anti-climactic.
Penny: Yeah, it kinda does, doesn't it?

4.6

Quote from the episode The Adhesive Duck Deficiency

Penny: You gotta help me get my arm into my sleeve.
Sheldon: (Eyes closed) Okay!
Penny: Is that my arm?
Sheldon: It doesn't feel like an arm.
Penny: Then maybe you should let it go.

4.6

Quote from the episode The Jiminy Conjecture

Leonard: Why would you buy peppermint schnapps?
Penny: Because I like peppermint, and it's fun to say schnapps!

4.6

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