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Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Penny: So, Tesla's the one that invented the electric car?
Sheldon: (laughs) No, Penny. No, the car is just named after him.
Penny: Okay, you don't have to be so smug about it. You know, you went to see that movie It because you thought it was about scary I.T. guys.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Leonard: It's the greatest scientific feud of all time. I mean, you can forget about Leibniz and Newton.
Penny: Done.

Quote from the episode The Geology Methodology

Raj: So Ruchi and I decided to keep things casual.
Penny: (scoffs)
Raj: What? What? I can handle casual.
Penny: (scoffs)
Raj: Oh, why do you keep doing that with your face?
Penny: Because you keep saying stupid things with yours.

Quote from the episode The Geology Methodology

Penny: Okay, this is about science. Why'd you come to me?
Sheldon: Well, because it's also about my reputation. And somehow you manage to hold your head high despite your checkered past.
Penny: Checkered past?
Sheldon: It's a figure of speech referring to how sexually promiscuous you were.
Penny: Really? Well, I've got a figure of speech about how sexually promiscuous you can go be with yourself.

Quote from the episode The Proton Regeneration

Sheldon: Well, it should be a scientist I respect. You know, someone with a pleasing voice and symmetrical facial features.
Bernadette: Is he talking about himself?
Penny: If he's talking, he's talking about himself.

Quote from the episode The Proton Regeneration

Penny: Uh, no. No, baby. I'm not your mama. Your mama's the nice lady we're gonna go see right now so I can rub this in her face. Do you hear that, suckers? She called me Mama!

Quote from the episode The Proton Regeneration

Penny: Hey, hey, hey, I can watch your stupid baby, okay? If she cries, I will pick her up. If she's hungry, I'll give her a bottle. And if she poops, I'll light some incense.

Quote from the episode The Collaboration Contamination

Penny: No, I've been reading Bernadette's parenting book. It's like the answer key to the Sheldon test.

Quote from the episode The Collaboration Contamination

Amy: Well, at work we've been doing some interesting research with neuroprosthetics.
Penny: Neat. I've been rewatching The O.C., so we're all leading productive lives.

Quote from the episode The Collaboration Contamination

Bernadette: Oh, and, Penny, she kinda threw up on your stuffed bear.
Penny: Oh, that's okay.
Leonard: Hey. That's an Ewok and it's mine.
Penny: Yeah, which is why it's okay.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Uh, well, you know, I'm here for you. What do you want to talk about?
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, last time, we focused on my life. If we're going to be real girlfriends, we should talk about you as well.
Penny: Well, you know, if we're gonna be real girlfriends, we should get a third girl we can trash behind her back.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, so we'd be catty. Oh, I like it. What about Sheldon's fianc She seems a bit dour.
Penny: Ooh, "dour". Meow!

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Oh, uh, hey, Beverly, you called my phone, not Leonard's.
Beverly Hofstadter: Actually, I was hoping to speak with you. Is this a good time?
Penny: Uh, that depends. What time is it where you are?
Beverly Hofstadter: Uh, just after 5:00.
Penny: (clears throat, and swaps fruit juice for a bottle of wine) Yeah, that counts.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Hey, Beverly.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, hello, Penny.
Penny: Uh, Leonard just left. He's gonna be so upset he missed your call.
Beverly Hofstadter: Why?
Penny: Because he ... Yeah, I don't know.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Leonard: It's okay. We're all here to help.
Sheldon: Yes. And this baby will have plenty of manly role models. Now, I'm certain that whatever Bernadette can't teach him, Penny can.
Leonard: Uh, she can pee into a bottle.
Penny: Mm-hmm. Anything with a neck wider than a nickel.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Like, what'd you do last night?
Beverly Hofstadter: I had Cuban food at the home of a man with whom I shared unsatisfying intercourse.
Penny: Wow. Okay.
Beverly Hofstadter: And to anticipate your next questions, roasted pork and sideways missionary.
Penny: Sure. Sure. 'Cause you were full.

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