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Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Penny: So, what's new in the world of physics?
Leonard: Nothing.
Penny: Really, nothing?
Leonard: Well, with the exception of string theory, not much has happened since the 1930s. And you can't prove string theory, at best you can say Hey, look, my idea has an internal logical consistency.
Penny: Ah. Well I'm sure things will pick up.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Leonard: It's the greatest scientific feud of all time. I mean, you can forget about Leibniz and Newton.
Penny: Done.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Penny: So, Tesla's the one that invented the electric car?
Sheldon: (laughs) No, Penny. No, the car is just named after him.
Penny: Okay, you don't have to be so smug about it. You know, you went to see that movie It because you thought it was about scary I.T. guys.

Quote from the episode The Re-Entry Minimization

Sheldon: Well, regardless, she has a distinct advantage in all tavern-based competitions. Pool, beer pong, wet T-shirt contests, they're all out.
Penny: Okay. Just for the record, I have never entered a wet T-shirt contest. I've won a few, but that's just because I spill when I'm drunk, so...

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Oh, uh, hey, Beverly, you called my phone, not Leonard's.
Beverly Hofstadter: Actually, I was hoping to speak with you. Is this a good time?
Penny: Uh, that depends. What time is it where you are?
Beverly Hofstadter: Uh, just after 5:00.
Penny: (clears throat, and swaps fruit juice for a bottle of wine) Yeah, that counts.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Uh, well, you know, I'm here for you. What do you want to talk about?
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, last time, we focused on my life. If we're going to be real girlfriends, we should talk about you as well.
Penny: Well, you know, if we're gonna be real girlfriends, we should get a third girl we can trash behind her back.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, so we'd be catty. Oh, I like it. What about Sheldon's fianc She seems a bit dour.
Penny: Ooh, "dour". Meow!

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Penny: Hey, Beverly.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, hello, Penny.
Penny: Uh, Leonard just left. He's gonna be so upset he missed your call.
Beverly Hofstadter: Why?
Penny: Because he ... Yeah, I don't know.

Quote from the episode The Explosion Implosion

Leonard: It's okay. We're all here to help.
Sheldon: Yes. And this baby will have plenty of manly role models. Now, I'm certain that whatever Bernadette can't teach him, Penny can.
Leonard: Uh, she can pee into a bottle.
Penny: Mm-hmm. Anything with a neck wider than a nickel.

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Leonard: How was work?
Penny: Well, you know, it's the Cheesecake Factory. People order cheesecake, and I bring it to them.
Leonard: So, you sort of act as a carbohydrate delivery system.
Penny: Yeah, call it whatever you want, I get minimum wage.

Quote from the episode The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

Penny: So, what do we got going on tonight, huh? Playing Halo watching Battlestar, drop some Mentos in Diet Coke?
Leonard: You want to watch Battlestar?
Penny: What can I say? I got my geek on, boys.

Quote from the episode The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

Penny: I cannot believe they're letting her just use them like that. I mean, anything she wants, they go panting after her like trained dogs. You know that just last week, she had Howard drive all the way to her uncle's house in Orange County to pick up her TV?
Sheldon: You once had Leonard and me get your television from your ex-boyfriend.
Penny: Apples and oranges here, Sheldon. I'm telling you, that girl is a user, ice-skating through the life on her looks, taking advantage of innocent weak-willed men, getting auditions for stupid network shows. It creams my corn.

Quote from the episode The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

Penny: Uh, hey, guys, guys, you will really appreciate this, I read the best science joke on the Internet. Alicia, you won't get it, but it's right up their alley. Anyway, so, this physicist goes into an ice cream parlor every week and orders an ice cream sundae for himself, and then offers one to the empty stool sitting next to him. This goes on for a while until the owner finally asks him what he's doing.
The man says, "Well, I'm a physicist, and (emphasis) quantum mechanics teaches us that it is possible for the matter above this stool to spontaneously turn into a beautiful woman who might accept my offer and fall in love with me."
The owner then says, Well, lots of single, beautiful women come in here every day, why don't you buy an ice cream for one of them, and they might fall in love with you?" And the physicist says, "Yeah, but what are the odds of that happening?"
Leonard: It's a little insulting, don't you think?
Penny: How would I know? I'm not even sure I get it.

Quote from the episode The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition

Sheldon: Congratulations, I see you did your laundry.
Penny: Well, sort of.
Sheldon: How does one sort of-
Penny: I bought new clothes, okay?

Quote from the episode The Geology Methodology

Raj: So Ruchi and I decided to keep things casual.
Penny: (scoffs)
Raj: What? What? I can handle casual.
Penny: (scoffs)
Raj: Oh, why do you keep doing that with your face?
Penny: Because you keep saying stupid things with yours.

Quote from the episode The Geology Methodology

Penny: Okay, this is about science. Why'd you come to me?
Sheldon: Well, because it's also about my reputation. And somehow you manage to hold your head high despite your checkered past.
Penny: Checkered past?
Sheldon: It's a figure of speech referring to how sexually promiscuous you were.
Penny: Really? Well, I've got a figure of speech about how sexually promiscuous you can go be with yourself.

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