Penny Quotes Page 2 of 39

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Quote from the episode The Anxiety Optimization

Penny: I love him, but if he's broken, let's not get a new one.

Quote from the episode The Colonization Application

Leonard: We cover ourselves in body paint and then we get on this big canvass and do our thing.
Penny: Woah, that's kind of a big step for a guy who only recently agreed to take his socks off.

Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution


Howard: I'm not signing a pre-nup.

Penny: All right, Howard Wolowitz, listen up! You sign anything she puts in front of you, because you are the luckiest man alive. If you let her go, there is no way you can find anyone else. Speaking on behalf of all women, it is not going to happen, we had a meeting.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Combustion

Beverly Hofstadter: Come to Mommy.
Penny: It's okay. Go ahead. *Leonard hugs Beverly*
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, my son.
Leonard: Oh, my mother.
Penny: Oh, my God.

Quote from the episode The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition

(Sheldon knocks on Penny's door three times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny. (Knocks 3 times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny. (Knocks 3 times)
Penny: Who do we love?
Sheldon: Penny.

Quote from the episode The Cushion Saturation

*Wolowitz checks his Caller ID*.
Wolowitz: Ooh, looks like I'm gonna have sex tonight. (answers) Hey, baby...
Penny: His right hand is calling him?

Quote from the episode The Flaming Spittoon Acquisition

Bernadette: Doesn't he know you have a boyfriend?
Penny: She doesn't have a boyfriend, she has a Sheldon.

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Penny: So that means, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor, you're a doctor and, Howard, you know a lot of doctors.

Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Leonard: Once you open the box it loses its value.
Penny: Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. I gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.

Quote from the episode The Proton Transmogrification

Penny: Oh, I get it. Like C-3PO. ... What happened to me?

Quote from the episode The Perspiration Implementation

Bernadette: Stuart took that rejection like a pro.
Penny: Well, he knew he was on the breast cam.
Amy: I don't have much practice turning men down. It wasn't so much fun.
Bernadette: Oh, you get used to it. Some guys you have to turn down over and over.
Penny: And sometimes we marry them anyway.

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Penny: Give my friend his stuff back.
Tod Zarnecki: I don't know what you're talking about.
Penny: Well then good news. Today's the day a girl's finally going to touch you in your little special place. *Kicks him in the groin*

Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation

Leonard: More Halloween candy. Didn't you just buy a bunch of it yesterday?
Penny: Oh, yeah. That's gone. It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.

Quote from the episode The Adhesive Duck Deficiency

Sheldon: Now remember, you were given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxer, so don't operate heavy machinery, and try not to choke on your own drool.
*Sheldon is is about to leave.*
Penny: Wait! You have to help me get into bed. (laughs) "Sheldon has to help me get into bed". Bet you thought I'd never say that!
Sheldon: Yes. Charmed. Your drug-addled candour knows no bounds.
*Sheldon follows her to her room after shutting the door. He pulls down the covers to help Penny into bed.*
Penny: You know people think you are this weird robot man who's so annoying all the time and you totally are. But then it's like that movie Wall-E at the end. You're so full of love and you can save a plant and get fat people out of their floaty chairs.
Sheldon: That's a fairly laboured metaphor but I appreciate the sentiment behind it.
Penny: Sing 'Soft Kitty' to me.
Sheldon: 'Soft kitty' is for when you're sick, you're not sick.
Penny: Injured and drugged is a kind of sick.
Sheldon: (sitting on the bed next to her) Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...
Penny: Wait wait. Lets sing it as a round. I'll start. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur... *Sheldon doesn't join in.*
Penny: So that is when you come in. I'll start over. Soft Kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur... Still nothing from Sheldon.
Penny: I've got all night Sheldon. *She starts again.*
Penny: Soft Kitty, warm kitty...
Sheldon: Soft Kitty, warm kitty... *They both sing the entire song together.*

Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment

Leonard: I don't believe it. What's gotten into him?
Penny: Oh, maybe a couple of virgin Cuba Libres that turned out to be kinda slutty.
Leonard: You didn't.
Penny: Hey, you do your little experiments, I do mine.

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