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Quote from the episode The Love Spell Potential

Penny: You know what? Give me the dice, I want to roll.
Howard: The dungeon master's supposed to roll.
Penny: Yeah, well Im supposed to be in Vegas throwing up on a shrimp buffet. Now give it.

Quote from the episode The Love Spell Potential

Penny: Fifteen's the point, the point is fifteen. Give the little lady some room. Here it is, coming out. Sixteen! Yes! Oh, please tell me we're playing for money.
Sheldon: Oh, even better than money. You gained experience points.
Penny: More potion, please.

Quote from the episode The Love Spell Potential

Leonard: All right, Amy, there's one ogre left. Take him out.
Amy: Okay.
Penny: Pretend he's that TSA agent. Come on.
Amy: Nineteen. Yes, this is turning out to be even better than Vegas.
Penny: No, it's not.

Quote from the episode The Spoiler Alert Segmentation

Leonard: I swear, that man is the most egotistical, insufferable human being I have ever met.
Penny: Yeah, but you two make such a cute couple. Like Bert and Ernie. You guys even teach me stuff about words and numbers.

Quote from the episode The Spoiler Alert Segmentation

Penny: My point is, as much as I want to live with you, I can't do it knowing how much Sheldon needs you.
Leonard: Please, the only thing he needs me for is to be his whipping boy, his, his stooge, his doormat.
Penny: Well, you know what they say, if it ain't broke...

Quote from the episode The Spoiler Alert Segmentation

Leonard: Oh, could you clear off a shelf for me in the bathroom? I take a lot of medicine.
Penny: Oh, please let some of it be Xanax.

Quote from the episode The Spoiler Alert Segmentation

Penny: I love him. This is just happening too fast.
Sheldon: You think this is fast? It's just a matter of time before I see Amy's leg stubble in my shower.
Penny: Yeah, and I've seen those legs. You might want to get some Drano.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Penny: Okay. So, the usual, with extra spit on Sheldon's hamburger.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Amy: Shame. Since you're my best friend, I thought it would be a good bonding opportunity.
Penny: I'm your best friend?
Amy: Don't you read my blog?
Penny: Oh, don't feel bad. I never read Leonard's, and I used to sleep with him.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Penny: Boy, this is great. I haven't had a vacation in ages.
Sheldon: In order to take a vacation, one first has to work.
Penny: You know, for a smart guy, you really seem to have a hard time grasping the concept, don't piss off the people who handle the things you eat.
Amy: That does seem to be a valid principle.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Bernadette: Can I stay here tonight?
Penny: Yeah. Why, what happened?
Bernadette: Howard's a complete and total ass.
Penny: Oh, yeah, that. Come on in.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Bernadette: I've actually been thinking I'm going to hyphenate, Bernadette Mary-Ann Rostenkowski-Wolowitz.
Penny: Nice. You know, you should totally get BernadetteMaryAnnRostenkowskiWolowitz.com before someone snaps it up.
Bernadette: Howard already took care of it.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Bernadette: When I first met Howard, he seemed so innocent to me, just a sweet little guy who lives with his mother.
Penny: Well, if that's what you like, I'll take you to the comic book store, the place is full of 'em.
Bernadette: Wait a minute. You set me up with Howard. Did you know about all the creepy stuff he was into?
Penny: Well, a little. You hear stuff.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Bernadette: Why didn't you tell me?
Penny: Well, I was gonna, but I didn't think it would go past the first date. Then, when it did, I thought for sure it wouldn't go past you meeting his mother. Definitely not past the two of you sleeping together. I mean, the warning signs were there, this is really on you.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Penny: Oh, my God, Howard. That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. And it came out of you.

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