Raj: Ever since I saw Pretty in Pink, I've wanted to go to an American prom. But then I saw Carrie and did not want to go to an American prom. Then I saw Never Been Kissed and I'm back on the prom bandwagon. This prom things been a real rollercoaster.

Raj: Okay, here we go. [to Leonard & Penny] Say cheese. [to Sheldon & Amy] Say cheese. [to Howard & Bernadette] Say cousin.

Howard: Still lives with his mom? Yikes, right?
Raj: Yeah, I'm not quite sure how to respond.

Sheldon: We'll take some funions.
Amy: Anything else?
Sheldon: Some York Peppermint Patties, a couple of Dr. Peppers, and run to Best Buy and see if they have a portable DVD player and Season 1 of a show called Hannah Montana.
Raj: Have her get Season 2. In Season 1 it was still finding itself.

Raj: (fanning himself) Oh, this heat is brutal!
Sheldon: As someone from the tropical sub-continent of India, you should know that fanning yourself in a humid environment only raises your body temperature.
Raj: Huh. That does explain why the servants used to look so hot while they were fanning me.

Sheldon: Wait, I'm confused. Why would you need both a robot girlfriend and a robot prostitute?
Howard: There's just some things you don't do with your robot girlfriend.
Raj: Boy, when you met Bernadette, the field of robotics really took a hit.

Raj: I have an idea.
Sheldon: I think I have the same one.
Howard: We've got to watch Back to the Future II.
Raj: I'll make the pop corn.

Leonard: We keep procrastinating. We saw Back to the Future II, pigeons playing ping pong, a bunch of countries that look like genitals, and one guy whose genitals look like Denmark!
Raj: Yeah, sorry for clicking on that.

Raj: I'm not the kind of guy who drops his friends because he's in a relationship.
Leonard: What happens if she doesn't like us?
Raj: Hey, you're my dear friends. You'll get a Christmas card for a couple of years and then you're dead to me.

Leonard: Wow, Raj, you were not lying about her.
Raj: I told you she exists!

Howard: You know, when I was a kid I loved going there but I could never get a ride.
Raj: Ooh, what if we got a van and drove around, and picked kids up?
Sheldon: Nice! Like at parks and schools.
Howard: Toy stores, puppet shows.
Leonard: Hold on, so your idea is to get a van and cruise the streets looking for kids to pick up?
Sheldon: Yes!
Leonard: And are you going to use candy to lure them in?
Raj: We are now!

Penny: You told Emily we hooked up?
Raj: Well, in my defense, I tell everybody.

Raj: Well, I would never leave you off my list. And not just because without you we're playing fast and loose with the word "list".

Raj: It's true. You're both gorgeous. Kinda says something about the man who could bed you both. *Laughs* (To Emily) You get why I've been alone most of my adult life?

Raj: So I've been trying to come up with a cute couple's nickname for me and Emily. What do you like better "Emipalli" or "Koothrapemily".
Howard: Why is it your last name and her first name?
Raj: Well, her last name is Sweeny, and something just didn't seem right about Koothrapeeny.