Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 1 of 154

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Quote from the episode The Locomotion Reverberation

Sheldon: Leonard, in the world of theoretical physics, you never finish; so much is unprovable.
But when I was studying that railway guide, it was so tangible and so satisfying that something just clicked. Then it clacked. Then it clicked, then it clacked, click-clack clickety-clack, and here we are. Whoo-whoo!

Quote from the episode The Locomotion Reverberation

Howard: How'd you even get that up the stairs?
Sheldon: I said to myself, "I think I can, I think I can." And then I couldn't, so I paid two men who promised not to come rob us later.

Quote from the episode The Emotion Detection Automation

Sheldon: Now, when the robots rise up, they'll know that I've been rooting for them the whole time.

Quote from the episode The Emotion Detection Automation

Sheldon: Of course you're fine. Not every member of a species finds a mate. Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin. Look at the contributions he made.
Raj: I'm not a virgin, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Wha- So now you think you're better than Isaac Newton?

Quote from the episode The Emotion Detection Automation

Penny: You know, how is this any different from you making me live with Sheldon?
Sheldon: Hey! I shared my Honey Nut Cheerios with you.
Penny: You gave me a bill at the end of every month.

Quote from the episode The Romance Recalibration

Amy: Aww, I remember signing our first Relationship Agreement.
Sheldon: You seem to be forgetting the "no nostalgia" clause.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: It says here that up to 80% of new mothers experience baby blues. And that the best thing to do is reassure them that they're doing a good job. Bernadette, you are doing a good job.
Bernadette: Thank you, Sheldon, I'm feeling better now.
Sheldon: Thank you, Internet. I'm telling you, with the right YouTube video, I can give Howard a vasectomy.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: I knew we should've never mentioned us living together in the first place.
Amy: She was gonna find out eventually.
Sheldon: Disagree. We've known about evolution since 1859. She still believes in Noah and his amazing zoo boat.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: Amy and I are living together in sin, like a couple of New Yorkers. Now, while you scold us, I'm going to get a knife and a fork. Joe may be sloppy, but Sheldon's not.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Amy: You know, there's a chance she might be okay with it.
Sheldon: Eh, I don't know. I am her precious little boy. And you did take my flower.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: It was fine, other than the weird-tasting juice Amy gave me. I slept the whole way.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: Oh, good Lord! Is that mistletoe? Don't you maniacs own a calendar?

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: Oh, you know. The Lone Star state. That should be its Yelp rating.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: We seem to be moving on to the annual coitus portion of your birthday festivities.
Amy: Is that okay?
Sheldon: I didn't put on my come-hither plaid PJs for nothing.

Quote from the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: Well, I believe we were kissing like randy teenagers, and your nose was whistling ever so slightly.
Amy: I'm sorry.
Sheldon: Oh, don't be. You were like a foxy tea kettle.

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