Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 143 of 262

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Quote from the episode The Hofstadter Isotope

Leonard: We all agreed that the third Thursday of every month would be Anything Can Happen Thursday.
Sheldon: Well, apparently the news didn't reach my digestive system, which, when startled, has its own version of Anything Can Happen Thursday.

Quote from the episode The Cohabitation Formulation

Penny: I'm sorry. I didn't know you had company. I don't want to impose.
Sheldon: No, no. It's not an imposition. At this point, in our ecosystem, you are akin to the plover, a small scavenging bird that eats extra food from between the teeth of crocodiles. Please, fly into our open maw and have at it.

Quote from the episode The Scavenger Vortex

Leonard: We did them at Princeton, too.
Howard: Oh, that's cute. Like it's a real college.
Sheldon: That's amusing. I was going to say the same about M.I.T., but it works for Princeton, too.

Quote from the episode The Einstein Approximation

Sheldon: I asked myself what is the most mind-numbing, pedestrian job conceivable, and three answers came to mind. Toll both attendant, an Apple Store genius, and what Penny does. Now, since I don't like touching other people's coins, and I refuse to contribute to the devaluation of the word genius, here I am.

Quote from the episode The Tenure Turbulence

Leonard: My point is, immortality is not only a possibility, it is real.
Raj: Only if you're this jellyfish which periodically reverts to a mass of undifferentiated protoplasm.
Sheldon: If I could keep my gMail account, I'd be okay with that.

Quote from the episode The Codpiece Topology

Penny: Sheldon, you are a smart guy, you must know-
Sheldon: Smart? I'd have to lose 60 IQ points to be classified as smart.

Quote from the episode The Intimacy Acceleration

Sheldon: Who would you choose?
Penny: Robert Downey, Jr.
Sheldon: Oh. I didn't think of Iron Man. You know, maybe after myself and I have dinner, we could meet you two for dessert.

Quote from the episode The Peanut Reaction

Penny: I want to talk to you.
Sheldon: What would we talk about? We've no overlapping areas of interest I'm aware of,. and you know I don't care for chit-chat.

Quote from the episode The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem

Leonard: So, how'd it go with Ramona last night?
Sheldon: Oh, great. She's smart, insightful and she has a very unique way of, you know, revering me.

Quote from the episode The Apology Insufficiency

Sheldon: I'd like to offer a laudatory statement about Howard's many excellent qualities that I believe will tip the scales back in his favor. Howard Joewl Wolowitz. H is for honesty, of which he has much. O's for outstanding, which he is such. W's for witty, he's quick with a joke. A's for artistic, his ability-
Agent Page: I'm sorry, Dr. Cooper, this matter is already closed.
Sheldon: But I still have rd Joel Wolowitz to go.

Quote from the episode The Communication Deterioration

Sheldon: Anyway, if you're looking for Leonard, he's with Koothrappali.
Penny: No, actually, I came to talk to you.
Sheldon: How nice!

Quote from the episode The Communication Deterioration

Leonard: Now that we're all on the same page, let's get together tonight and work on it.
Sheldon: Get together tonight? Leonard, stop trying to control everything, and give poor Raj a chance to come up with what we should do. Go ahead, Raj.
Raj: Okay, I think we should do it right now.
Sheldon: Tonight works better for me.

Quote from the episode The Communication Deterioration

Penny: If I was at a train station and one train could take me to my current job and the other train could take me to an audition for a movie, which train should I get on?
Sheldon: Are you using trains to trick me into giving you advice?
Penny: No.
Sheldon: All right then. You should take a third train where you audition for the movie, but hold off on making a career decision until you have more information.

Quote from the episode The Communication Deterioration

Leonard: Some times Raj and I feel pushed aside.
Raj: Yeah. Like when you took Sheldon to Texas and showed him all around NASA. You didn't even think to ask me and Leonard.
Howard: You know what, you're right. I should have asked you.
Sheldon: And if he does ask you, go. It's amazing.

Quote from the episode The Communication Deterioration

Howard: Now if we're talking about being left out, you guys went to Skywalker Ranch without us.
Sheldon: Oh, I recommend that too. That was a magical experience.

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