Penny: Well, who you gonna hit on? The girl in front of us got strawberry. That's your favorite.
Sheldon: No. No, if we both like it, I'll spend the rest of my life opening the freezer and going, "Aw, no strawberry."

Penny: What about the girl behind the counter?
Sheldon: Well, she spends her whole day scooping. One arm's probably bigger than the other.
Penny: Is it possible you might not actually want to meet someone?
Sheldon: You are truly wise.
Penny: Thank you.
Sheldon: I'd say wise beyond your years, but you're getting up there.

Sheldon: I need to prepare her now to save her from pain down the road.
Penny: Down the road? Sheldon, she wanted to share a toothbrush holder with you, and now you're at an ice cream parlor trying to pick up women!
Sheldon: Well, anything can sound silly when you put it in that tone.

Amy: You know, with us living together, maybe we could think about having people over.
Sheldon: We have people over all the time. We have the maintenance people, the pizza delivery man, that UPS driver who feels the need to ask how parts of me are hanging.

Sheldon: You expressed an interest in having people over, and I feel I dismissed it too quickly. So, I took matters into my own hands, and I arranged a brunch.
Amy: Well, that's so nice. Who's coming?
Sheldon: Oh, uh, Stuart, Bert from the geology lab, and Mrs. Petrescu from downstairs.
Amy: You mean the Romanian lady on the second floor?
Sheldon: Yes. Oh, fun story: she grew up with ten siblings. Or possibly penguins. Her English is atrocious.
Amy: That's an odd mix of people.
Sheldon: Well, for our first time hosting, I thought it would be wise to conduct a trial run. You know, like how I practiced for that Halloween haunted house by going into the bathroom at the bus station.
Amy: You never went into that haunted house.
Sheldon: You never saw what jumped out at me at the bus station.

Stuart: Really, no one else is coming?
Sheldon: Oh, this is it. You are the practice round.
Stuart: Practice round? For-for what?
Amy: Uh, no. He just means that you were the first people we thought of.
Sheldon: You know, exactly. We've never thrown a brunch before, and I wanted to work out all the kinks.
Stuart: So, I'm like a lab rat before your real friends come over?
Sheldon: You see, your words sound reasonable, but your face looks angry.

Sheldon: Help me out here. This is not where I shine.
Amy: Stuart, you know you're one of our favorite people.
Sheldon: Okay, now, see, you look sincere, but your words are completely false. I'm glad we did this test run. These brunches are wild!

Stuart: You know what, I think I'm just gonna go.
Amy: No, Stuart, don't.
Stuart: No, I consider you and Sheldon like my family, and I'm not even sure you think of me as a friend. You have any idea how that feels?
Amy: We're so sorry.
Stuart: I'm always the last one anybody thinks of.
Sheldon: Well, no, that's not true. I mean, sometimes it's Koothrappali. But we're not supposed to say that 'cause he's a minority.

Stuart: You know what I love about you?
Sheldon: Hmm?
Stuart: You never leave the house without a paper clip!
Sheldon: You never know when two pieces of paper might temporarily need fastening in the top left corner.

Amy: We're also coming to you live from a different apartment.
Sheldon: Dr. Fowler and I began an experiment in living together after her apartment became water damaged. This is our friend Penny's place. You may remember her from our episode "Flags: And the People Who Don't Understand Them."

Amy: It's almost dinner time. You in the mood for anything?
Sheldon: Yeah, we could get Thai food near your apartment and then drop in and check on the progress.
Amy: Oh, you don't want do that, it's a construction zone.
Sheldon: So?
Amy: Well, what about your fear of stray nails and butt cracks?
Sheldon: I am terrified of stepping on a nail and falling into a butt crack.

Amy: Why are you speaking Klingon?
Sheldon: Why are you speaking English?

Howard: You know, if he moves across the hall for good, Leonard could keep the stuff you don't like in Sheldon's old room. Solves everything.
Penny: That's a great idea!
Leonard: Ooh, maybe I could turn it into a gaming den.
Raj: That would be amazing.
Sheldon: Wait, wait, hold on - excuse me, that's my room.
Leonard: But you won't be living here.
Sheldon: But that's my room.
Leonard: But you won't be living here.
Sheldon: But that's my room.
Leonard: You guys might want to start eating. But you won't be living here.
Penny: Sweetie, once you stop paying rent, none of this is really yours.
Sheldon: But that's my room.
All: But you won't be living here!

Sheldon: Well, I suppose we could find a whole new place. You know, and, technically, we don't even have to stay in Pasadena. We could, we could move to Altadena or a place that doesn't even end in "dena."

Sheldon: Hey, when can we start running tests on it?
Amy: No reason we can't start right now.
Sheldon: What stimulus should we introduce it to first? Light, sound, temperature? Ooh! Ooh! Let's expose it to images of me and you and see who it likes better.