Sheldon: Wait, I'm a little concerned. Blueberries are rich in antioxidants.
Leonard: So?
Sheldon: So, with all those antioxidants, what if I run out of oxidants?

Raj: Okay, the NASA Web site says Howard's final descent has begun.
Sheldon: He left a boy, he returns a boy-sized hero.

Sheldon: It's a quark-gluon plasma.
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: It's asymptotically free partons inside a quark-gluon plasma.
Leonard: Nothing with quarks.
Sheldon: It's an observational rebuttal of the Lambda-CDM model of the universe.
Leonard: No.
Penny: It's a chocolate chip cookie.
Amy: Yes.
Leonard: How could you miss that?
Sheldon: Hey, if you want someone to guess chocolate chip cookie, you draw a glass of milk next to it.
Leonard: Penny got it.
Sheldon: Yeah, only after I eliminated all the obvious answers. You're welcome.

Sheldon: I am not a loser. Pictionary is not a true test of any real intelligence or skill.
Leonard: Mmm. In all fairness, Pictionary has verbal skills, visual skills. It's a pretty well-rounded game.
Sheldon: Lot of big talk from a man who can't draw a chocolate chip cookie.

Amy: Why don't we do something athletic like go over to the university pool and play water polo?
Leonard: No good, Sheldon doesn't float.
Sheldon: That is true. I have a higher than normal body density. If I run too deep a bath, I drown.

Sheldon: Oh, ow, blueberry in my nose, blueberry in my nose!
Leonard: Snort it down and keep eating!

Penny: You really think there's some kind of scientific discovery in here?
Sheldon: Well, this box only covers my work through nursery school. There's a good deal more to come. I didn't really hit my academic stride until I cut out that time-suck known as playing outdoors.

Alex: Look, Dr. Cooper. I really want this position. It would be an incredible honor to work for a man of your brilliance.
Sheldon: Flattery will not get you this job, Ms. Jensen.
Alex: It's not flattery if it's the truth.
Sheldon: Oh, well, thank you. Welcome aboard.

Leonard: Wait, Alex, do you want to join us?
Sheldon: Alex, a moment. I need a word with Dr. Hofstadter.
Do you think it's appropriate for her to sit with us, given her station?
Leonard: Given her what?
Sheldon: If I've learned anything from British television shows on PBS, it's that servants dine down stairs with their own kind.
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: It's a kindness, Leonard. Otherwise, you're cruelly tempting them with a glimpse of a world that's just beyond their soot-stained fingertips.

Leonard: So, you're going to spend hours and hours combing through all this stuff?
Sheldon: That's a good point. My time is much too valuable. You know, perhaps I should find someone to do it for me. You know, someone with a rudimentary understanding of science, but whose real talents lie in menial labor.
Leonard: Not gonna happen.
Sheldon: Well, if I didn't think you could handle it, I wouldn't be asking.

Sheldon: All right, Ms. Jensen. Uh, before we begin, may I offer you a refreshment? Water, coffee, tea, a marijuana cigarette?
Alex: No, thanks. I'm fine.
Sheldon: Now, are you sure? Everyone's smoking them. I think they're the best.
Alex: I don't do drugs.
Sheldon: Excellent, yeah. That was a ruse. They're not the best. Physics is the best. And by the way, coffee was also an unacceptable choice.

Sheldon: All right, so I see here you're from Des Moines, Iowa. Uh, you're summa cum laude in theoretical physics from Stanford University. Oh, and two years ago, you had a persistent ear infection. I hope that didn't cause any hearing loss.
Alex: No, of course not. How did you know about that?
Sheldon: I did a comprehensive background check. Medical records, credit reports, criminal history. (Hiding mouth behind a binder) I trust you paid off those parking tickets.
Alex: Yes, I did.
Sheldon: Hearing unimpaired, good.

Alex: It's nice to meet you. I'm so excited to be working with Dr-
Sheldon: Yeah, please reserve chitchat for your breaks, Ms. Jensen. FYI, there will be no breaks.
Alex: I should probably get to work.

Alex: Here's your frozen yogurt, Dr. Cooper.
Leonard: This should be fun.
Sheldon: Half chocolate, half vanilla, side by side, not swirled?
Alex: Yes.
Sheldon: Half a teaspoon of sprinkles?
Alex: Rainbow, not chocolate.
Sheldon: Two cherries?
Alex: One on top, one on the bottom.
Sheldon: Stems removed?
Alex: Um, top one, yes. I didn't check the one on the bottom.
Leonard: Oh!
Alex: I'm so sorry, Dr. Cooper.
Sheldon: It's all right, Alex. I'm not mad at you, I'm just disappointed.

Sheldon: Oh, good, Leonard, you're here. Science news. This will interest you. And, Penny, feel free to paint your nails.
Leonard: What do you got?
Sheldon: I believe Alex may have unearthed the grade school science project that could be my ticket to the Nobel Prize. Behold.
Leonard: "Magnets: What Do They Stick To?" If the answer is metal, it's not exactly groundbreaking.
Sheldon: The original title was A Rederivation of Maxwell's Equations Regarding Electromagnetism. I dumbed it down because some of the more religious people in town were starting to say I was a witch.