Quotes from ‘The Tangerine Factor’

The Tangerine Factor

The Tangerine Factor
Season 1, Episode 17 - Aired May 19, 2008

When Penny breaks up with her boyfriend after he posts intimate details about their relationship on his blog, Leonard tries to comfort her but inadvertently convinces her to get back with her ex-boyfriend. When it turns out her boyfriend has already moved on, Penny is angry at Leonard for his bad advice. Later, Leonard asks Penny out on a date and she says yes. Leonard and Penny each turn to Sheldon for romantic advice.

Quote from Howard

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Quote from Leonard

Howard: So you're saying, if in the depths of despair she throws herself at you and demands you take her right there, right now, you'll just walk away?
Leonard: I said I'm her friend, not her gay friend.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: Before you say anything, have you heard of Schrodinger's cat?
Penny: Actually, I've heard far too much about Schrodinger's cat.
Leonard: Good.
*Leonard and Penny kiss*
Penny: All right, the cat's alive. Let's go to dinner.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Incredible. You managed to screw up the screw up.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (In Mandarin) Show me your mucus. Your mucus!
Chen: (Mandarin) Blow your own nose and go away!
Sheldon: (Mandarin) This is not a tangerine bicycle. Show me your mucus!
Chen: Crazy man. Call the police.
Sheldon: (Mandarin) No, don't call the library. Show me your mucus.

Quote from Howard

Raj: (Reading Game Card) Enslaved by warlocks, stay here till you roll 2,4,or --
Leonard: She was mad at him, she was done with him, the relationship was broken beyond repair and I walked over there and I fixed it.
Howard: Boy that story gets better every time you hear it.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Why are you learning Chinese?
Sheldon: I believe the Szechuan Palace has been passing off orange chicken as tangerine chicken, and I intend to confront them.
Leonard: If I were you, I'd be more concerned about what they're passing off as chicken.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (Practising speaking Mandarin) Show me your citrus peels.
Penny: Sheldon?
*Sheldon freaks out in Chinese.*
Penny: I'm sorry. Look, do you have a second?
Sheldon: A second what? Pair of underwear?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Mmm. (In Mandarin) Your monkey sleeps inside me.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Elevators, parks, movie theaters. Out of curiosity, is this subway, the transportation system, or Subway, the sandwich shop?
Penny: Sandwich shop.
Leonard: Doesn't that violate the health code or--?
Penny: No, at the sandwich shop, we were only making out.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (Mandarin) Long live concrete? Thank you.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Maybe I am her gay friend.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (Speaking Chinese to Leonard).
Howard: You just called Leonard a syphillitic donkey.
Sheldon: My apologies, Leonard. I'm only as good as my teacher.

Quote from Penny

Penny: Hey, jerk face, you forgot your iPod.

Quote from Penny

Penny: Drop dead, you stupid, self-centered bastard.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Leonard might be home, can we talk in my apartment?
Sheldon: We're not done?
Penny: No!
Sheldon: Eh, why not? We're already through the looking glass anyway.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: What I'm saying is, Leonard might be different in a good way. And obviously, my usual choices have not worked out so well.
Sheldon: Your last choice worked out for Koothrappali. He got a free iPod.

Quote from Leonard

Penny: (crying) How could he do that?
Leonard: Oh, you did throw an 80-gig iPod-- Yeah, no, how could he do that?

Quote from Howard

Howard: Not now, I have a blog to find.

Quote from Howard

Howard: Apparently, he posted intimate details of their physical relationship on his blog, which I cannot find anywhere.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Howard, I'm gonna need another mandarin lesson, I obviously didn't make my point with those people.
Howard: For God's sake, Sheldon, if you don't like the tangerine chicken, don't order the tangerine chicken.
Sheldon: I like tangerine chicken, I'm just not getting tangerine chicken.

Quote from Sheldon

Howard: What's this? (hand movement)
Sheldon:That's what you did. I assumed, as in a number of languages, that the gesture was part of the phrase.
Howard: Well, it's not.
Sheldon: Why am I supposed to know that? As the teacher, it's your obligation to separate your personal idiosyncrasies from the subject matter.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Sheldon, this date is probably my one chance with Penny. What happens if I blow it?
Sheldon: Well, if we accept your premise, and also accept the highly improbable assumption that Penny is the only woman in the world for you, then we can logically conclude that the result of blowing it would be that you end up a lonely, bitter old man with no progeny. The image of any number of evil lighthouse keepers from Scooby-Doo cartoons comes to mind.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (In Mandarin) Many oxen are in my bed! Many, many oxen!
*Chen flings his hands at Sheldon*
Sheldon: (Mandarin) Oy Vey.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Hey, look, I found an iPod.
Howard: It's smashed beyond repair. What are you gonna do with it?
Raj: What else? Sell it on eBay as slightly used.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: What about if you went out with me?
Penny: Are you asking me out?
Leonard: Um, yes, I am, asking you out.
Penny: Wow.
Leonard: I was just going off your comment about the nice guy...
Penny: No, I know, I got that. Yeah, totally.
Leonard: ...thing and honestly, it's no big deal.
Penny: Yes.
Leonard: Yes what?
Penny: Yes, I will go out with you.
Leonard: Really?
Penny: Yeah. Why not, I mean, what do I have to lose?
Leonard: Yeah. That's the spirit.