Quotes from ‘The Friendship Algorithm’

The Friendship Algorithm

The Friendship Algorithm
Season 2, Episode 13 - Aired January 19, 2009

When Sheldon wants to use the university's grid computer, he decides to befriend the guy who controls access. Not well versed in the art of making friends, Sheldon develops a friendship algorithm to win over Kripke.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: A fear of heights is illogical. A fear of falling, on the other hand, is prudent and evolutionary.

Quote from Howard

Wolowitz: *After he fixed Sheldon's algorithm* Gee, why can't Sheldon get a friend?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: What part of an inverse tangent approaching an asymptote don't you understand?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: "Barney Bunny has two daddies now." Probably something about homosexual rabbits.

Quote from Leonard

Penny: What about Howard and Raj? How did he become friends with them?
Leonard: I dunno. How do carbon atoms form a benzene ring? Proximity and valence electrons.
Penny: Sure, when you put it like that.

Quote from Howard

Wolowitz: Have you thought about putting him in a crate when you're out of the apartment?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: (After Leonard whistles) First warning.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Sheldon: That's where I sit.
Barry Kripke: Ooh, you have a special spot. What kind of wacko are you?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: "Gerry the Gerbil and the bully boys on the bus." Read it, not helpful.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Sheldon: Kripke, what would you say to the idea of you and I becoming friends?
Barry Kripke: I would say "I have no interest in becoming your friend".

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: I like to floss before I eat so my gum pockets are open to new food.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Leonard: How was rock climbing?
Barry Kripke: He passed out. He just hung there like a big salami.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Hey, Hofstadter. Heard about your latest proton anti-decay experiment. 20,000 data runs and no statistically significant results. Very impressive.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: That's awfully sticky.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Nope, I wanna climb some rocks.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Come on, they have birthday parties here. Little kids climb this.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Hey, look at you Cooper. You're almost half way to the top.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Hello to you, too!

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Be right back. I gotta floss the Indian food out of my teeth if I'm going to eat Chinese.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Barry Kripke: Hello. How did I walk past you? I'm Barry.
Penny: Penny.
Barry Kripke: That's not a very hot name. I'm gonna call you Roxanne.