Sheldon: It's not cartoons, it's anime!
Penny: I give up. He's impossible!
Sheldon: I can't be impossible; I exist! I think what you meant to say is, 'I give up; he's improbable'.
Penny: Oh man, did the KISS Army repeal 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell?
Wolowitz: They're called tattoo sleeves... Put them on, have freaky sex with some freaky girl with her business pierced, take them off, and I can still be buried in a Jewish cemetary.
Wolowitz: Yes, she's pushy, and yes, he's whipped -- but that's not the expression.
Leonard: Sheldon, you can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat!
Sheldon: Actually, it turns out I can.
Sheldon: Interesting. Sex works even better than chocolate to modify behavior. I wonder if anyone else has stumbled onto that.
*In tattoo salon*.
Girl: What are you gonna get, Raj?
Raj: With my luck - Hepatitis!
Sheldon: You know, I've always wanted to go to a goth nightclub.
Howard: Really?
Sheldon: Bazinga! You never see any of my practical jokes coming, do you?
Leonard: I'm just saying, you catch more flies with honey then with vinegar.
Sheldon: You catch even more with manure, what's your point?
Leonard: They're gonna get beaten up at that club.
Penny: They're gonna get beaten up at Walgreens.
Sheldon: Penny, while I subscribe to the "Many Worlds" theory which posits the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons in an infinite number of universes, I assure you that in none of them am I dancing.
