Quotes from ‘The Status Quo Combustion’

The Status Quo Combustion

'The Status Quo Combustion' - Season 7, Episode 24

With his career in flux Sheldon struggles to deal with all the changes in his life, leading him to make a drastic decision. Meanwhile, Raj and Emily's relationship takes a step forward, while an injured Mrs. Wolowitz puts a strain of Howard and Bernadette's life.

Air Date: May 15, 2014.

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: Little warning before you jump into this marriage business. You're not just marrying him, you're marrying his family.
Penny: I think Leonard's mom's okay with me.
Bernadette: It doesn't matter if she's okay with you. The question is can she go to the bathroom by herself?

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: But we have jobs, we can't babysit her twenty-four hours a day.
Howard: What if we use our vacation time?
Bernadette: I wanted to go to Hawaii, not Hell.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Boy, I'm so hungry today. I wonder why.
Howard: Because you had sex the other night?
Raj: You know what, that might be it. By the way, it isn't like riding a bike. I fell off a few times.

Quote from Penny

Penny: No, mom. It's the same guy I've been going out with for the past two years. Yeah, the scientist. Well, it's complicated. He works with lasers and atomic magnets. No, I did not see it coming. No, we have not set a date. No, I am not pregnant. Yeah, this is a first for our family.

Quote from Howard

Leonard: How's your mom holding up?
Howard: She's okay, but we just lost another nurse.
Amy: How many's that now?
Howard: Two, and I know what you're thinking: she's eating them.

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: Sorry, I'm late. The leaf blower broke so I had to hand dry my mother-in-law.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm writing an appeal to the faculty senate so that I can move on from string theory.
Leonard: How's it going?
Sheldon: You tell me. "Dear esteemed colleagues. As you may know, I have requested to change my field of study. My decision to do so is, I believe, in the best interest of science. At your convenience, I'd be happy to explain it to you in words you'll understand."

Quote from Stuart

Howard: Hang on, I know a place where you could you stay and earn some money at the same time.
Stuart: Great!
Howard: I just have to warn you: it will involve humiliation, degradation and verbal abuse.
Stuart: So, what's the catch?

Quote from Amy

Amy: He was really angry that you suggested he move out.
Leonard: Oh.
Amy: I also mentioned that he and I could live together, but he was too mad at you to realize what a great idea that is.

Quote from Beverly Hofstadter

Beverly Hofstadter: In any event, while I've had my misconceptions about *Penny*, Sheldon spoke very fondly of her. And if she is good enough for him, then she's good enough for me.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Here, I made you some Strawberry Quik.
Sheldon: I have real problems here, Amy. I can't be mollified with a beverage designed for children. *Takes a sip* Mmm, yummy.

Quote from Bernadette

Penny: We're engaged!
Raj: Wow. I thought me having sex with Emily was going to be the big news.
*Amy, Bernadette, Howard and Sheldon rush to Raj*
Leonard: Hey, hey. What the hell?!
Bernadette: You guys propose all the time, this never happens.
Penny: You're right. Yay!
*Leonard & Penny go to celebrate with Raj*

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: It's nice that you called them esteemed.
Sheldon: You're right, I'll take that out.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: I'm gonna see where he is.
Penny: How?
Leonard: I know his password so I can track his phone.
Penny: You do that?
Leonard: Not always. But ever since he wandered off at the swap meet chasing a balloon, I get worried.

Quote from Amy

Amy: It actually sounds like he's doing pretty well.
Penny: I really think this is going to be for the best.
Leonard: Me too. And he was able to take a sabbatical -
*Amy starts hitting Leonard with a pillow*
Amy: How could you let him go!?

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: Howie, I love you. And as your wife, your mother is every bit as much my problem as she is yours. So, I want a divorce.

Quote from Leonard

Penny: This is so sweet. You never cook for me.
Leonard: Well, you cook for me all the time and eugh.
Penny: If you don't like my cooking, why haven't you ever said anything?
Leonard: Well, it's hard to talk with so much heavy chewing to do.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: So, should we talk about setting a date?
Penny: Well, I'd like to choose one that works with my brother's schedule.
Leonard: Right and when would that be?
Penny: Twelve to eighteen months from now, depending on good behavior.

Quote from Stuart

*As Stuart moves a box, a piece of the ceiling falls down*
Stuart: That could have killed me. ... Can't catch a break.

Quote from Stuart

Howard: Don't take this the wrong way, but did you do this for the insurance money?
Stuart: No! God, you sound like the police, the fireman, my parents, my therapist and the insurance company.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Sheldon, I'm going to miss you.
Sheldon: Of course you are.
Leonard: You just made that easier.

Quote from Leonard

Beverly Hofstadter: Let me save you all of your hemming and hawing. Sheldon already told me that you and Penny are engaged.
Leonard: I hate that you talk to him more than you talk to me.
Beverly Hofstadter: Would you like for me and you to talk more?
Leonard: You know, it's probably fine.

Quote from Beverly Hofstadter

Beverly Hofstadter: Leonard, would it make you feel better to hear that your mother approved of your life choices?
Leonard: Yes, it would.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yeah. Well, you should work on that.

Quote from Penny

Bernadette: You're not working. How'd you like a job in home healthcare?
Penny: Not a chance.
Bernadette: Please, I'm desperate.
Penny: No.
Bernadette: I'll pay anything you want.
Penny: Okay then, yeah.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: So, listen. There was something I was hoping to float past you. Now that Penny and I are engaged, I thought we might want to talk about our living arrangements.
Sheldon: Of course. She's spent many nights here, and you're worried about preserving the myth of her virginity before the wedding.
Leonard: I'm not.
Sheldon: Good. Because not only has that ship sailed, if it hit an iceberg countless men would perish.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Maybe I'll move in with Penny, or maybe she and I'll take this place and you can move across the hall.
Sheldon: Move across the hall?! Did you take a marijuana?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I see. You're putting your future bride's happiness above mine.
Leonard: Well, yeah!
Sheldon: Wow.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: You know, this might work out for the best. You're always complaining about what a terrible roommate Leonard is. Like how he turns up the thermostat when you're not there.
Sheldon: Euck, it's like walking into the Amazon. And not the good Amazon with one-day shipping, the awful one with birds and snakes.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Maybe you'll like living alone.
Sheldon: Perhaps.
Amy: And if you don't, maybe you and I could live together.
Sheldon: Oh, sure! While we're at it, why don't we get engaged, too? Why don't we get a little house, start a family, enjoy our sunset years together? Do you hear yourself woman?!

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm helping you get back on your feet. I would like to purchase this comic book, please.
Stuart: It'll be $2.99.
Sheldon: Really? It's soaking wet.
Stuart: Fine, $1.

Quote from Penny

Penny: He can take care of himself. We went over Stranger Danger and gave him that whistle.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: It's dark out and he's alone. I don't like it. Let's go get him.
Penny: It's sweet how you look out for him. You're a good guy.
Leonard: It's not just that. My mother would kill me if I let something happen to him.

Quote from Raj

Stuart: I was wondering if I could crash at your place for a few nights.
Raj: Sure, of course. Oh, actually Emily was going to spend the night.
Stuart: You slept with her? Nice.
Raj: I can't take all the credit. She let me do it to her.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Seriously? You don't even have a change of clothes or a toothbrush.
Sheldon: My plan is to stop at malls and buy what I need. It's called living off the land.

Quote from Penny

Penny: He'll be okay. You taught him well, Padawan.
Sheldon: Good Lord. Padawan is the student, not the teacher.
Penny: Seriously, let him go.

Quote from Howard

Bernadette: She's just so impossible, they keep quitting.
Sheldon: So who's watching her now?
Howard: A bowl full of M&Ms with a few Ambien tossed in.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: You tracked my phone?
Leonard: Yeah.
Sheldon: Boy, you chase one balloon for three miles.
Penny: We were worried about you.
Sheldon: Don't be melodramatic. I'm just getting on a train and leaving for ever.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: You know he can't take a trip like this by himself.
Penny: He's a grown man.
Leonard: No, he looks like a grown man. You've seen Freaky Friday, sometimes little kids end up in big person bodies.

Quote from Beverly Hofstadter

Leonard: I'm your son. What about the fact that she's good enough for me?
Beverly Hofstadter: *blank shrug* Sure.

Quote from Stuart

Stuart: I don't mean to be rude, Sheldon, but my life is kinda falling apart right now.

Quote from Howard

Bernadette: I don't think the service is going to send any more people.
Howard: Yeah, maybe it's time we just release Ma back into the sea.

Quote from Leonard

Sheldon: [President Siebert said] that everybody has to do things they don't want to do. He then gave an example of something he had to do although he didn't want to. And that was look at my stupid face.
Leonard: That's a rude thing to say ... out loud.

Quote from Howard

Sheldon: It's an outrage. Honestly, I am tempted to leave the university.
Howard: You know, if you're really serious about that I hear there are some exciting opportunities in home care for the old and fat.

Quote from Beverly Hofstadter

Beverly Hofstadter: Hello, Leonard.
Leonard: Hi, mom. I have some exciting news.
Beverly Hofstadter: I'm listening.
Leonard: Before I tell you, will you promise to try and be happy for me and keep any concerns you have to yourself?
Beverly Hofstadter: No.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: You hate the sound of all those keys on his keychain.
Sheldon: Four keys! Who does he think he is? A warden?

Quote from Stuart

Sheldon: Can you break a twenty?
Stuart: No, I only have hundreds.
Sheldon: You know what. I don't always recognize sarcasm, but I do right now and I don't appreciate it. I'm sorry for your loss, but you're not the only one whose day's been a disaster.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: And by the way, I saw you make this Strawberry Quik with syrup. You're supposed to use the powder.
Amy: It tastes the same.
Sheldon: No, the syrup tastes better and I don't like it.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: We might want to live together.
Sheldon: Oh. Well, I've already given this some thought. And I'm willing to let Penny live with us, one day a week for a trial period. Now, obviously not when she's made cranky by the shedding of her uterine lining.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: So when will you reopen?
Stuart: I don't know. I'm waiting to hear back from the insurance company.
Sheldon: So tomorrow?

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