Latest Quotes Page 2 of 392

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: I knew we should've never mentioned us living together in the first place.
Amy: She was gonna find out eventually.
Sheldon: Disagree. We've known about evolution since 1859. She still believes in Noah and his amazing zoo boat.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Holiday Summation

Bernadette: How can she hate me? I make her food in my chest! It's like hating a frozen yogurt machine.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Holiday Summation

Bernadette: Everyone's a better mom than me.
Raj: Oh, don't take it so personally, maybe your baby's just a jerk.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Holiday Summation

Sheldon: It says here that up to 80% of new mothers experience baby blues. And that the best thing to do is reassure them that they're doing a good job. Bernadette, you are doing a good job.
Bernadette: Thank you, Sheldon, I'm feeling better now.
Sheldon: Thank you, Internet. I'm telling you, with the right YouTube video, I can give Howard a vasectomy.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Amy: What is this?
Sheldon: A functional MRI of my brain. I did Sudoku before they took it so I'd be ripped.
Amy: I love it. Thank you.
Sheldon: And it's not just an MRI. The orbitofrontal cortex is lit up because I was thinking of you.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: I am starting to rethink the Flash onesie I bought this kid.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Howard: She would've been the best grandma.
Bernadette: She did always have candy in her pocket.
Howard: Yeah. I was 20 years old before I figured out Tootsie Rolls weren't naturally warm.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Amy: All right, you can open your eyes. I thought I'd let Harry Potter make things hotter.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Amy: What's wrong?
Sheldon: I'm not sure. Earlier tonight, things began organically, and now it's feeling forced, like all the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Raj: Don't come to the hospital. We're headed home.
Penny: Oh, that was fast. Did she sneeze the baby out?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: Childbirth, looming coitus? This is a banner night for female genitals.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: This is for you. I was going to wrap it, but touching Scotch tape gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Amy: I'll put in on the list with peaches and felt.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: We seem to be moving on to the annual coitus portion of your birthday festivities.
Amy: Is that okay?
Sheldon: I didn't put on my come-hither plaid PJs for nothing.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: Well, I believe we were kissing like randy teenagers, and your nose was whistling ever so slightly.
Amy: I'm sorry.
Sheldon: Oh, don't be. You were like a foxy tea kettle.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Birthday Synchronicity

Sheldon: You know, I just learned Amy went to a theme park without me, but I'm not going to ruin her birthday. I'll wait, and ruin 24 individual hours sprinkled throughout the year.

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