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Quote from Mary Cooper in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Penny: This is the best cobbler I've ever had.
Mary Cooper: It was always Sheldon's favorite. You know what the secret ingredient is?
Penny: Love?
Mary Cooper: Lard.

Quote from Mary Cooper in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary Cooper: You know how your daddy used to say that you could only fish for so long before you gotta throw a stick of dynamite in the water?

Quote from Mary Cooper in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary Cooper: I tell you, I love that boy to death but he has been difficult since he fell outta me at the K-Mart.

Quote from Mary Cooper in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary: Leonard, the Lord never gives us more than we can handle. Thankfully, He blessed me with two other children who are dumb as soup.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: I'm taking a sabbatical because I won't kowtow to mediocre minds.
Penny: So you got canned, huh?
Sheldon: Theoretical physicists do not get 'canned'. But yeah.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Penny: I always say that when one door closes, another one opens.
Sheldon: No it doesn't. Not unless the two doors are connected by relays or there are motion sensors involved. Or if the first door closing creates a change of air pressure that acts upon the second door.
Penny: Never mind.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary Cooper: You know, you two make a cute couple.
Leonard: No, no we're not, we're not a couple, we're single, two singles, like those individually wrapped slices of cheese that are friends.
Mary Cooper: Did I pluck a nerve there?
Howard: Oh yeah.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: The thing about tomatoes, I think you will really enjoy this, is that they are shelved with the vegetables but they are technically a fruit.
Penny: Interesting.
Sheldon: Isn't it!
Penny: No, I mean what you find enjoyable.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: I read an article about Japanese scientists who inserted DNA from luminous jelly fish into other animals; and I thought "Hey! Fish night-lights".
Leonard: Fish night-lights.
Sheldon: It's a billion dollar idea, ssh!

Quote from Howard in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Wolowitz: Whaddup science bitches?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary Cooper: Honey, why did you get a loom?
Sheldon: Well, I was working with luminous fish and I thought, hey, loom.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Leonard: Howard brought a date?
Sheldon: A more plausible explanation is that his work in robotics has made an amazing leap forward.

Quote from Mary Cooper in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary Cooper: I'm sorry, did I start that sentence with the words, "If it pleases your highness?"

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: Oh boy.
Penny: What now?
Sheldon: Well, while there's some value to taking multivitamins, the human body can only absorb so much. What you're buying here are the ingredients for very expensive urine.
Penny: Well, maybe that's what I was going for.
Sheldon: Well, then you would want some manganese.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: There wouldn't have been any ass kickings if that stupid death ray had worked.

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