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Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Jiminy Conjecture

Raj: I don't like bugs, okay? They freak me out.
Sheldon: Interesting. You're afraid of insects and women. Ladybugs must render you catatonic.

Quote from Leonard in the episode Pilot

Leonard: Our babies will be smart and beautiful.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Prom Equivalency

Raj: Okay, here we go.
(To Leonard & Penny) Say cheese.
(To Sheldon & Amy) Say cheese.
(To Howard & Bernadette) Say cousin.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Prom Equivalency

Sheldon: Thank you for understanding.
Amy: Of course I understand. Sheldon, there's something else I've been wanting to say, but before I do, I just. I want you to know you don't have to say it back. I know you're not ready and I don't want you to say it just because social convention dictates -
Sheldon: I love you, too.
Amy: You said it.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Proton Displacement

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Tangerine Factor

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Prom Equivalency

Sheldon: I really did think you looked pretty.
Amy: You did?
Sheldon: Yes. So much so that I started to panic.
Amy: Well you can relax. Just because you think I look pretty doesn't mean we have to spend the night together.
Sheldon: Were you hoping we would because it's prom?
Amy: I'm always hoping. But tonight, I just wanted to have a nice time with you. Maybe dance with someone who has arms.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Gorilla Dissolution

Bernadette: Maybe we should get one of those machines to help her up the stairs.
Howard: You mean a fork lift?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Gorilla Experiment

Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid.
Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Prom Equivalency

Stuart: I'm not bringing your mother. I have a date.
Howard: Oh, so now you're cheating on my mother.

Quote from the episode The Mommy Observation

Sheldon: Well, this is confusing for me. But I don't want to stand in the way of your happiness. So, I will condemn you internally while maintaining an outward appearance of acceptance.
Mary: That is very Christian of you.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Cooper Extraction

Raj: (To Amy) If you were having Sheldon's baby, would you really want him in the room?
Penny: If he's in the room when they're making the baby, I'll give you $10.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Griffin Equivalency

Sheldon: I'm not insane. My mother had me tested!

Quote from Amy in the episode The Space Probe Disintegration

Penny: Do I really force you to do things you don't want to?
Amy: Yeah, but it's okay.
Penny: How is it okay?
Amy: I promised myself if I ever got friends I'd do whatever they said. Really, I'm lucky you found me before a cult did.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Champagne Reflection

Amy: Sheldon, that was beautiful.
Sheldon: If you didn't press record-
Amy: I pressed it!

Quote from Amy in the episode The Scavenger Vortex

Amy: As my mom used to say, "When you're doing a puzzle, it's like you've got a thousand friends." She was full of fun lies like that.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Status Quo Combustion

Bernadette: Little warning before you jump into this marriage business. You're not just marrying him, you're marrying his family.
Penny: I think Leonard's mom's okay with me.
Bernadette: It doesn't matter if she's okay with you. The question is can she go to the bathroom by herself?

Quote from Amy in the episode The Proton Transmogrification

Amy: I guess it must have been back when I was in the Girl Sprouts.
Bernadette: Girl Sprouts?
Amy: My mom made it up as an alternative to the Girl Scouts. She didn't want me selling cookies on some street corner like a whore.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Graduation Transmission

Leonard: My point is, while you're spending all this time on your own. Building computers or practising your cello, what you're really doing is becoming interesting. When people finally do notice you, they're gonna find someone a lot cooler than they thought. And for those of you that were popular in high school, it's over, sorry. Thank you. Congratulations.

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