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Quote from Penny in the episode The Application Deterioration

Bernadette: I'm a little tired, Howie. You ready to go?
Howard: Yeah, one sec. I just need to sign this contract.
Bernadette: What is it?
Howard: Well, we ran into a problem about my share of the patent, so we're forming a partnership to split anything we make equally.
Penny: Sheldon, did you draft the contract?
Sheldon: You bet I did.
Penny: Ooh. (To Amy) You're gonna make out so hard tonight!

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Application Deterioration

Bernadette: So, you're just gonna sign this without having a lawyer look at it?
Sheldon: Excuse me. I've been drafting contracts since kindergarten. Didn't need a lawyer to get me out of finger painting. Don't need one now.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Application Deterioration

Sheldon: Hey, Leonard.
Leonard: What?
Sheldon: If she doesn't think that we should apply for this patent, she's being patently absurd.
Leonard: Good one.
Sheldon: Okay, you got it. See, I was afraid it was a thinker.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Application Deterioration

Howard: What are you doing?
Bernadette: I just want to make sure you've thought this through.
Howard: What's to think about? We have an invention and want to move forward.
Bernadette: Howie, you're about to form a legal partnership with Sheldon Cooper.
Howard: All right, if you're gonna calmly make excellent points, then I don't know if I want to talk to you.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Application Deterioration

Howard: Okay, I get it. And it's sweet that you're worried about me, but I can take care of myself.
Bernadette: I'm not worried about you. I'm worried about me. I don't want to go through this pregnancy listening to you complain about Sheldon driving you crazy more than you already do.
Howard: Oh, here we go with the ironclad logic again.

Quote from Howard in the episode The Application Deterioration

Bernadette: You've tried to work with him before. It hasn't gone well. Why is this time gonna be any different?
Howard: Is the fetus helping you? 'Cause that's cheating.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Application Deterioration

Raj: Hello?
Claire: Hey, Raj. It's Claire. How are you?
Raj: Hi. I'm good. Really good.
Well, I don't know why I said "really good." I'm just regular good. I really just wanted to sound confident. And that "really" was a real "really", not a fake "really" like the first "really."
Claire: Really?
Raj: I don't know. I lost track and I missed my exit.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Application Deterioration

Raj: So, uh so what's up?
Claire: Well, last time we talked, I had just gotten back together with my boyfriend, and I wanted to let you know that things didn't work out.
Raj: Really? I'm sorry, I swear I know other words.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Application Deterioration

Claire: So if you were still interested-
Raj: Yes! Indeed! Absolutely! Indubitably! I'm not even sure what the last one means, but it's another word, and I know it.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Application Deterioration

Raj: So, uh, when do you want to meet up?
Claire: Uh, I'm almost off work. What are you doing now? Right now, well- Well, actually, tto be completely honest, I'm stopping by to see my ex-girlfriend because she's having a tough time. But it's not like we're getting back together or anything.
Claire: Let me guess, the worst part about breaking up is that she doesn't have her best friend to talk to anymore?
Raj: That's exactly what she said! How do you know that?
Claire: I'm a girl. It's, like, page one out of the playbook.
Raj: Any chance you could send me a PDF of that playbook?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Application Deterioration

Howard: But, um, we were talking, and I'm a little concerned about the three of us forming a partnership.
Sheldon: Are you suggesting a limited liability corporation? Cause I did not L-L-"see" that coming.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Application Deterioration

Penny: What if Sheldon had no choice but to be respectful?
Leonard: Is there a switch on the back of his neck we don't know about?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Application Deterioration

Penny: No, what I'm saying is you could add a clause to the contract that he can't make fun of Howard.
Bernadette: How would you enforce it?
Sheldon: Oh, please. Any contract I sign is enforced by my own personal code of ethics.
Amy: And his obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Sheldon: Yeah, that, too. And scoot over. Part of your shadow's on my spot.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Application Deterioration

Leonard: Howard, what do you think?
Howard: I'm on board.
Sheldon: I'll add it right now. Oh, baby, it's addendum time!

Quote from Amy in the episode The Application Deterioration

Sheldon: The revisions I made start on page four.
Penny: Wow. That is a lot of "whereupons".
Amy: You should see the Valentine's Day card he gave me.

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