Sheldon: The revisions I made start on page four.
Penny: Wow. That is a lot of "whereupons".
Amy: You should see the Valentine's Day card he gave me.

Raj: You know, I have too much self-esteem to let this girl guilt me into getting back together with her.
Amy: You don't need to be pregnant to smell that load of crap.

Sheldon: Is there a reason I had to leave my own apartment?
Amy: Well, I think they just want you to see it for the first time all decorated.
Sheldon: But who's gonna tell them they're doing it wrong?
Amy: Well, I'm sure they'll ask you to give a speech, and that's when you just tear 'em a new one.

Amy: You realize none of those things would happen now?
Sheldon: I do, but why do you care if I celebrate my birthday at all?
Amy: Well, you made my last birthday so memorable, I wanted to return the favor.

Penny: Oh, it's Leonard. He says Sheldon's drunk and they're gonna do karaoke if we want to join them.
Penny: That sounds fun.
Amy: Oh, no. Sheldon's drunk texting me.
Bernadette: What's it say?
Amy: "Would you like to sing karaoke with us."
Bernadette: How is that a drunk text?
Amy: He used a period instead of a question mark. He's so wasted.

Amy: How could you do that?
Bernadette: I'm sorry, but you know what it's like when you're with your man and one thing leads to another.
Amy: I do know what that's like. I really do.

Amy: So, when did you guys decide to get pregnant?
Bernadette: Well, we didn't exactly decide. We were talking about it, and then one night we got a little reckless.
Penny: Oh, tell us!
Amy: Yeah, tell us.
Bernadette: No, I'm embarrassed.
Penny: Oh, come on, we're all grown-ups. We've all done it.
Amy: Me, me, me too! I'm a grown-up and I've done it!

Amy: Are you hungry? How about that sushi place you love?
Bernadette: Doctor said I can't have sushi.
Penny: Okay, look, we don't have to go anywhere. We can just, you know, stay here and hang out in the hot tub.
Bernadette: Doctor said I can't go in the hot tub.
Amy: Maybe you should get a new doctor. What, he said you can't laugh either?

Amy: I have an idea. Maybe someone in our audience would be interested in meeting Rajesh. Ladies, I can attest that he is a kind, handsome, intelligent -
Raj: Rich parents! Don't forget, rich parents!
Amy: -spoiled astrophysicist who not only...

Amy: Oh, looks like we just lost Kripke.
Barry Kripke: Actually, I'm still here.
Amy: Now?
Barry Kripke: Yup.
Amy: Now?
Barry Kripke: Yup!
Amy: Now? ... Oh, looks like we just lost Kripke.

Amy: Since we're live, you'll finally be able to reach out to us with your flag thoughts and flag questions.
Sheldon: Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time. Uh, yes, I really am a doctor. Uh, yes, she really is my girlfriend.
Amy: No, I just blink a lot, it's not Morse code for "rescue me."

Amy: Okay, and we are live in 22 minutes.
Sheldon: I'm nervous. I hope people will be around to watch even though it's Valentine's Day.
Amy: People who are fans of an Internet show about flags? Trust me, they're around.

Sheldon: Oh, and speaking of Valentine's Day, I haven't forgotten about you tonight.
Amy: What do you mean?
Sheldon: Well, you've become such an integral part of my life as well as this show, I felt it only right to include your name in the title.
Amy: Oh, that is so sweet.
Sheldon: So from now on, this program will be officially known as Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun With Flags.
Amy: Catchy.

Amy: Look, I know you think I'm not right for Sheldon, but trust me, I'm his best shot. You have no idea how much I put up with!
Meemaw: I know more than you think I do.
Amy: Really? You know what it's like to have date night ruined because Google changed their font?

Amy: Look, I get that you're protective of your grandson, but he's an adult now. Maybe I understand what he needs better than you do.
Meemaw: I appreciate your honesty, dear.
Amy: Thank you.
Meemaw: And here's some more honesty: I don't like you very much.
Amy: Well, maybe I don't like you either.