Barry Kripke Quotes Page 4 of 5

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Quote from the episode The Killer Robot Instability

Barry Kripke: Tell you what. Forget the SCRFLRRI, let's settle this roboto-a-roboto. There's no guarantee we're going to go against each other in the round robin, so let's throw down. You know, unless you're afraid.

Quote from the episode The Killer Robot Instability

Barry Kripke: We're all pathetic and creepy, and can't get girls. That's why we fight robots.

Quote from the episode The Killer Robot Instability

Barry Kripke: If you're not there, you'll be exposed to ridicule.

Quote from the episode The Killer Robot Instability

(O.S. - In video) Barry Kripke: As you can see, the Kripke Crippler is reducing the Chevy Cavalier to rubble.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Barry Kripke: (To Raj, slipping him a dollar) Yeah, nice speech, Francine.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Barry Kripke: Yes, yes, yes. He's a jolly good fellow. What time do the strippers arrive?

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Howard: Actually, Barry, we're not going to have strippers tonight.
Barry Kripke: Aww, then what the flip did I get $200 in singles out for?

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Barry Kripke: Nobody cares, Hofstadter. Wrap it up.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Barry Kripke: Howard, I'm going to say something to you that everybody's thinking but nobody has the courage to say out loud. When you invite a man to a bachelor party, the implication is there will be strippers. Maybe not completely nude, but at least pasties and G-strings. That's not unreasonable!

Quote from the episode The Discovery Dissipation

Barry Kripke: There he is! It's my favorite superhero, The Retractor.

Quote from the episode The Discovery Dissipation

Barry Kripke: Cooper, maybe physics just isn't your thing. Have you ever considered a career in retail? Then you could take things back for a living.

Quote from the episode The Discovery Dissipation

Sheldon: No, that's okay. I can fight my own battles. Isn't that right, Bawwy?
Barry Kripke: Is that a reference to my speech impediment? That's pretty hurtful. I can't control it.
Sheldon: You're right. That was uncalled for. I take it back.
Barry Kripke: Of course you do, because you're The Retractor!

Quote from the episode The Tenure Turbulence

Kripke: If you need my nose, you'll find it firmly lodged up the rectum of the tenure committee.

Quote from the episode The Tenure Turbulence

Barry Kripke: I'd love to babysit for you. Kids love me. Something about me just makes them waff and waff.

Quote from the episode The Rothman Disintegration

Sheldon: As you know, the essence of diplomacy is compromise. With that in mind, I propose the following: I will take Rothman's office... and you will find a way to be okay with that.
Barry Kripke: How about I take Rothman's office and you go suck a lemon?

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