Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz Quotes Page 1 of 25

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Quote from the episode The Decoupling Fluctuation

Bernadette: Why don't you stand up to them?
Howard: What am I supposed to say?
Bernadette: I don't know. Say, being mean is lame, what's cool is being nice.

Quote from the episode The Ornithophobia Diffusion

Sheldon: It's remarkable. All that time spent in fear. And for what? He's magnificent. Oh, dear. I just realized I haven't offered you a beverage.
Bernadette: Oh, it's just like my grandma with her parrot. And after she lost her marbles with her remote control.

Quote from the episode The Cohabitation Formulation

Howard: What's so funny?
Bernadette: Nothing. Just thinking about the noises people make during sex.
Howard: I do sometimes get a bit carried away, don't I?
Bernadette: It's cute. You sound a little like a drunken monkey. Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh!
Howard: You know it's meant as a compliment.
Bernadette: That's how I take it.

Quote from the episode The Fish Guts Displacement

Amy: Okay, okay, here's the deal. I don't need your medicine. I'm not sick.
Bernadette: I don't understand.
Amy: I got better two days ago. It's just been so nice having Sheldon take care of me.
Bernadette: So you've just been lying to him?
Amy: See the stuff in my nose? Rubber cement.
Bernadette: I don't mean to be judgy, but this is the kind of thing lunatics do.

Quote from the episode The Proton Resurgence

Bernadette: Hang on, you've had her for hours?
Raj: Yes. I picked her up, and then we both went for massages to try and calm down. And then we got Pinkberry.
Bernadette: So you knew she was okay, and you couldn't pick up the phone to tell us?
Raj: Well, I, I thought about-
Bernadette: Don't well me, mister. We've been worried sick. She could have been dead for all we knew. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Raj: Sorry. I, I just-
Bernadette: Sorry's not good enough. Maybe you need to take some time and think about what you've done. (ends the Skype call)
Howard: Nice guilt trip. You are gonna be an amazing mom!

Quote from the episode The Proton Resurgence

Bernadette: Well, you were the one who was supposed to put her back in the stroller.
Howard: No, I wasn't. You were.
Bernadette: No, I wasn't.
Howard: Yes, you were!
Bernadette: Yeah, well, you throw like a girl.

Quote from the episode The Confidence Erosion

Penny: This was a good idea. It's been a long time since we've had girls' night.
Amy: Yeah, it's so nice to have a relaxing evening at home doing nothing.
Bernadette: Yeah, really breaks up the other 30 days I've spent on bed rest doing nothing.

Quote from the episode The Confidence Erosion

Amy: I think you'd be great at that. Don't you agree, Bernadette?
Bernadette: Huh? I'm listening. I'm listening. I'm not watching The Crown.

Quote from the episode The Bitcoin Entanglement

Leonard: That's right. It must be on my old laptop.
Raj: Well, let's go.
Howard: Hey, Bernie, you mind if I run to Leonard's and-
Bernadette: Get a laptop full of money? Why are you still here?! Go, go, go!

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Bernadette: Sorry things worked out like that.
Raj: Because I'm in pain or because you don't have a spy anymore?
Bernadette: Let's just leave it at "I'm sorry." You're already sad.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Raj: I can't believe she dumped me.
Bernadette: This is tough for me, 'cause I can.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Bernadette: I never would've undermined a coworker.
Raj: What? Oh, please. Wh-What about that guy Eric, who you told it was "Bring Your Cat to Work Day" when you knew your boss had asthma?
Bernadette: That was just a hilarious prank that ended with me getting a corner office.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Bernadette: Hey, what are you two doing here?
Ruchi: We won't stay long. I just wanted to drop something off from me and the girls at work.
Bernadette: None of the girls at work like me enough to get me a gift.
Ruchi: Okay, so you'll know why everyone at the office has the same handwriting.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Bernadette: That bitch.
Howard: Oh, come on, he means well. He's just trying to impress his girlfriend.
Bernadette: I'm talking about Ruchi. She's after my job. Why do you think she said, "Take all the time you need"?
Howard: Because she was being nice?
Bernadette: No, she's trying to steal my projects while I'm at home taking care of this useless plant and my dumb family.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Howard: I'm only saying this because I love you and because you can't reach me from that bed, but you sound a little crazy.
Bernadette: I love you, too, but I could fling this card in your eye like a ninja throwing star.
Howard: I don't believe you. (covers his eyes and backs out of the room)

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