Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz Quotes Page 2 of 32

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Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: Check it out, LeBron James posted a picture of me and him on Instagram.
Penny: I don't see you.
Bernadette: Look right behind him.
Penny: No.
Bernadette: Okay. You see that table just past his left shoulder? Now go back two more tables and over to the right.
Penny: All I see is a yellow smudge.
Bernadette: That's me!

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Penny: Ugh, God, now I feel bad.
Bernadette: I know. Maybe we should take her out again and do some damage control.
Penny: You know, that's a good idea. Think she can get us into SoHo House?
Bernadette: I don't know, but we owe it to Raj to try.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: So what is the craziest request anyone's ever made?
Anu: Oh, you know, I can't really say. Concierge-guest confidentiality.
Penny: Really, that's a thing?
Anu: (laughs) No. This one time, I had to go to Walmart at 3:00 a.m. because Britney Spears needed to blow bubbles.
Bernadette: Oh. That is so cool. By the way, do not tell Raj that you met Britney Spears, because he will literally die.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Anu: We've been talking so much about me, tell me about Raj.
Penny: Okay, are you trying to get us drunk so we'll dish on our friend?
Bernadette: 'Cause it's totally gonna work, what do you want to know?

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Anu: Come on.
Penny: There's really nothing to tell. Raj is so much fun to hang out with. He's like one of our girlfriends. And I mean that in a good way.
Bernadette: But also a bad way.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Anu: Anything else?
Penny: No.
Bernadette: No.
Penny: I mean, he takes baths with his dog, but not in a weird way.
Bernadette: Or a normal way; they both wear swimsuits.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: Look, I think that's LeBron over there.
Penny: James?
Bernadette: No, LeBron Kershenbaum.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Anu: [on the phone] Okay, I got you two seats to Hamilton tonight. Your tickets will be at the concierge desk. Of course. My pleasure. [to Bernadette and Penny] May I help you?
Bernadette: Yes, I'm here to pick up our Hamilton tickets.
Penny: Stop.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Penny: We just want to see if we could take you to dinner and get to know you a bit.
Anu: That sounds nice. How about tonight after work? Maybe we can go to Bavel.
Penny: Oh, I wish. That place is impossible to get into.
Anu: Oh, please. Getting into impossible places is my superpower.
Bernadette: Me, too. I can fit my whole body in our dryer.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: She can get into any restaurant, but the best husband she can find is Raj?

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: I'm pumping!
Penny: It's Penny.
Bernadette: Oh, come in.
Penny: I thought you were pumping.
Bernadette: I thought you were my boss.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Penny: Okay, listen, I'm really worried about this whole Raj thing.
Bernadette: I know, he's so desperate to get married, which is weird, because I can't imagine we make it look that great.
Penny: I know, right?

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Bernadette: Well, I could ask my dad. Maybe he can get some of his old cop buddies to do a background check on her.
Penny: Would he do that?
Bernadette: Of course. He's a retired cop who plays by his own rules. [on the phone] Hi, Daddy. No, everything's good. I just have a favor to ask. Yeah, so, my friend Raj is marrying this woman that he barely knows, and I wanted to see if you could use your connections to dig up any dirt on her. Uh-huh. Sure. Okay. Love you.
Penny: Is he in?
Bernadette: Absolutely not. He won't do it. It's totally illegal.
Penny: I thought you said he played by his own rules.
Bernadette: He does, but apparently, they're very similar to the actual rules.

Quote from the episode The Procreation Calculation

Bernadette: The same thing happened to me. Penny said she didn't want kids, and I told her she was being silly, and she accused me of being condescending. Which is crazy, because if I wanted to be condescending, I would've said, "Ooh, 'condescending.' That's such a big word."

Quote from the episode The Procreation Calculation

Howard: Why won't our friends just listen to us? We obviously know what we're talking about.
Bernadette: I know. We're married, we have great kids, great jobs, this great house. ["Smooth Operator" starts playing in Stuart's room again]

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