Beverly Hofstadter Quotes Page 5 of 6

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Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Excuse me, Leonard. I'm the one getting a divorce, Mitsy's dead, why are you the one making a fuss?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, did I thank you for the flowers?
Sheldon: You did.
Beverly Hofstadter: I don't really like flowers.
Sheldon: Me neither, but it's the social convention.
Beverly Hofstadter: It is, isn't it?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Leonard: Wait, wait, wait. You had surgery?
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, and Sheldon sent me flowers.
Leonard: I heard that.
Beverly Hofstadter: Then what was all that "wait, wait, wait" about?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Leonard: I just don't understand why he knows more about your life than I do.
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, I would assume it's because Sheldon and I stay in touch due to mutual interests and respect, while you avoid me due to unresolved childhood issues.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Sheldon: We discussed it at length during our last video chat. Although how we got on to the subject of you is baffling.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, but we are on the subject, so I'm obliged to ask: Leonard, how are you?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: Your scan data will be very helpful to my research. You have a remarkable brain.
Sheldon: I know. Although, I've always hated how my right frontal lobe looks in pictures.
Beverly Hofstadter: Common complaint among men. Nothing's ever big enough. Except when they get a tumor, Then you never hear the end of it.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: If you want to have intercourse with that girl, find out what kind of cologne her father wore.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: Aside from a pro forma consummation of our marriage, his father and I only had intercourse for the purposes of reproduction.
Sheldon: That seems a fairly efficient arrangement.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, we think so. We've both done papers on it. Mine from the neuroscientific point of view and his from an anthropological. Mine, of course, was the only one worth reading.
Sheldon: Of course. I would very much like to read about your sex life.
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, it's all online, or you can order it from the Princeton University Press.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: Well, Leonard's younger brother, Michael, is a tenured law professor at Harvard, and his sister just successfully grew a human pancreas in an adolescent gibbon.
Howard: So, she's close to curing diabetes?
Beverly Hofstadter: Why else would you grow a pancreas in a teenaged gibbon?
Howard: Wow, you must be very proud.
Beverly Hofstadter: Why? They're not my accomplishments. I have to urinate.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: You know, both selective mutism and an inability to separate from one's mother can stem from a pathological fear of women. It might explain why the two of you have created an ersatz homosexual marriage to satisfy your need for intimacy.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: You must be Leonard's mother.
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, I don't know whether I must be, but yes.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: I'm Penny. I'm his neighbor.
Beverly Hofstadter: I'm Beverly Hofstadter.
Penny: Nice to meet you. *Offers to shake hands*
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, you're a hand shaker. Interesting.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: I'm curious. What was Leonard like when he was little?
Beverly Hofstadter: I think you mean young. He's always been little.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: What was he like when he was young?
Beverly Hofstadter: You'll have to be more specific.
Penny: Oh, like five or six.
Beverly Hofstadter: *looks at Penny*
Penny: Five.
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh. Well, at that age he was well enmeshed in what Freud would call the phallic stage of pyscho-sexual development. An outmoded theory, of course, but the boy did spend most of his waking hours with a tight grasp on his penis.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: It's out of order.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, I can read the sign. I was just pondering the implications.
Penny: I think it implies that the elevator doesn't work.
Beverly Hofstadter: Again, I can read the sign. But the sign and the tape are covered with a layer of dust which indicates the elevator has been non-functional for a significant period of time, which suggests either a remarkable passivity among the - I assume - 24-36 residents of this building - based on the number of mail boxes and typical urban densities - or a shared delusion of functionality.

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