Dr. Koothrappali Quotes Page 1 of 2
Quote from the episode The Confidence Erosion
Dr. Koothrappali: Son, don't take this the wrong way, but what's your problem?
Raj: I would tell you, but apparently it takes 45 minutes.
Quote from the episode The Confidence Erosion
Dr. Koothrappali: I, too, was in a relationship with someone who made me feel bad about myself.
Raj: If you're talking about Mom, I don't want to hear it.
Dr. Koothrappali: I'm just saying, if you replace Howard with a nice 22-year-old grad student, your self-confidence will soar.
Quote from the episode The Allowance Evaporation
Raj: Uh, listen, I just wanted to let you know when you get my credit card bill, it might be a little high this month.
Dr. Koothrappali: Well, you're a grown man with a steady job. Why wouldn't you spend all your father's money?
Quote from the episode The Allowance Evaporation
Raj: I can't believe what I'm hearing. This is deeply hurtful.
Dr. Koothrappali: You're also too sensitive. Women don't want that either.
Quote from the episode The Allowance Evaporation
Dr. Koothrappali: You're an adult who can't get by without an allowance from his parents. Women don't want that.
Raj: What are you saying, that you're giving up on me? What kind of father gives up on his son?
Dr. Koothrappali: I have six children, five of whom are married and self-sufficient. I don't think I'm the problem.
Quote from the episode The Allowance Evaporation
Dr. Koothrappali: Oh, no, my grown son is going to stop spending all my money. Where did I fail as a father?!
Raj: Yeah, that's right. Keep asking yourself that! But I still love you very much, so don't cut me out of the will.
Quote from the episode The Dependence Transcendence
Dr. Koothrappali: Hello, Rajesh. Are you calling to ask for money?
Raj: What? No.
Dr. Koothrappali: Are you calling to ask for things that cost money?
Raj: No.
Dr. Koothrappali: Great. What's up?
Quote from the episode The Dependence Transcendence
Dr. Koothrappali: What seems to be the trouble?
Bernadette: Something's wrong. I don't care about any of the baby stuff every other mom is so into. Honestly, I'm not even sure I like babies.
Dr. Koothrappali: Look, some people are baby people, and some people are not baby people. It doesn't mean you won't love your own baby.
Quote from the episode The Dependence Transcendence
Bernadette: But I thought I'd be more excited.
Dr. Koothrappali: Oh, being excited isn't a guarantee of anything. Rajesh's mother was thrilled when she was pregnant with him. After he was born, she doted on his every move. And you know what happened? He broke her heart, moved halfway around the world, and dates only poor white women. So you never know.
Quote from the episode The Clean Room Infiltration
Dr. Koothrappali: I see you got engaged.
Penny: Yes, we did.
Dr. Koothrappali: Let me tell you a story.
Raj: Dad.
Dr. Koothrappali: Sorry. I'm sure you won't grow to hate each other.
Quote from the episode The Clean Room Infiltration
Penny: So, Dr. Koothrappali, long flight?
Dr. Koothrappali: Twenty hours.
Penny: Ooh, that's rough.
Dr. Koothrappali: Not at all. Did you know that when you fly Transcontinental without your wife, you don't pray for the plane to crash?
Quote from the episode The Clean Room Infiltration
Dr. Koothrappali: Relax? Easy for you to say. Your mother isn't cleaning out your bank account. Forty years, the woman never cleaned a thing.
Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction
Raj: Hello Mummy, Daddy, how are you?
Mrs. Koothrappali: Pretty good, can't complain.
Dr. Koothrappali: Oh I'm sure you can. Just give it a minute.
Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction
Dr. Koothrappali: Matchmaking, very smart move son. Much better than marrying for love.
Mrs. Koothrappali: We married for love.
Dr. Koothrappali: And it's been wonderful.
Quote from the episode The Wiggly Finger Catalyst
Raj: Oh, Mummy, Daddy. What a nice surprise.
Dr. Koothrappali: No, it's not a nice surprise, it's a bad surprise.
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