Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 2 of 68

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Quote from the episode The Habitation Configuration

Bernadette: Howie, you promised you'd move.
Howard: And I will.
Penny: Yeah, right.
Howard: I will. I'm obviously not going to live in my mother's house for the rest of my life. I'm not a child.
Penny: I've seen her burp you.
Howard: She did not burp me. She was patting me on the back, and I happened to burp.

Quote from the episode The Habitation Configuration

Howard: All right, I've had enough of this. I'm a grown man, I have a successful career, for the love of God, I've been to space. I will move out when I'm ready, and I don't need anyone badgering me into it.
Penny: Wow, excuse me.
Howard: That was just for her benefit. I'll move tomorrow. I love you. Don't leave me.

Quote from the episode The Vegas Renormalization

Raj: What happened with Leslie, why did she dump you?
Howard: I don't know. She just said Howard, momma's a rolling stone. And then her call waiting beeped and she was gone.
Sheldon: I don't understand. If you were in a non-emotional relationship then why are you having what appears be an emotional response?
Leonard: Sheldon, he obviously had feelings for her.
Howard: Of course I had feelings for her, I saw her naked for God's sake!

Quote from the episode The Vegas Renormalization

Leonard: Howard, could I borrow some after shave?
Howard: Black case, top compartment.
Leonard: That is a lot of cologne.
Howard: First row are your musks, second is wood, leathers and botanicals, third is assorted pheromones, tread lightly.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Bernadette: What's all this?
Howard: Well, we missed our date night, and Stuart's working again, so I thought we could have a date night here at home.
Bernadette: Aw, that's so sweet.
Howard: Oh. So is that really what you're wearing to our date night?
Bernadette: Well, Stuart's not here and the kids are sleeping. I could wear nothing.
Howard: You might want to hold off on that, we're starting with soup.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Bernadette: There goes date night.
Howard: Are you kidding? Stuart's here! Get your purse. We're going out.
Bernadette: What about the dinner you made?
Howard: Right. Hey, Stuart! That can of soup sitting by the stove, that's for you!
Bernadette: You made canned soup for date night?
Howard: And you wore sweatpants. Let's go.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Howard: I talked to her yesterday. She really seems to know her stuff.
Sheldon: Challenge accepted.
Howard: That is not what that was.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Howard: You look great.
Bernadette: Oh, thanks. Would you believe this is actually a dress from before I was pregnant?
Howard: Well, it's not a competition, but I wore this suit to my Bar Mitzvah.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Stuart: Obviously, vibranium is the most powerful metal in comics.
Raj: What, more powerful than adamantium?
Sheldon: He's right. Wolverine's claws, Ultron's outer shell. Need I go on?
Howard: You don't need to, but you probably will.

Quote from the episode The Comet Polarization

Penny: No, there's something fuzzy.
Howard: Is it your teen years?
Penny: No. Yes. Shut up.

Quote from the episode The Reclusive Potential

Raj: You understanding any of this?
Howard: I haven't understood anything since poop tomato.

Quote from the episode The Reclusive Potential

Raj: Sheldon's right. This guy, this guy's brilliant.
Howard: Yeah, I mean, he's a little kooky, but a mind that can reconceptualize time probably has a reason for keeping a jar of toenail clippings that we just don't understand.

Quote from the episode The Reclusive Potential

Raj: What is so exciting?
Sheldon: It's a letter from Dr. Wolcott. We've been corresponding about my string theory research.
Leonard: Wait. Robert Wolcott? Like Wolcott's Theorem Wolcott?
Sheldon: The very same.
Raj: Didn't he go crazy and cut off all contact with people?
Howard: Yeah, he was driven mad by a friend who kept wanting to talk about the Hulk's car insurance!

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Howard: Can't believe you got her number.
Raj: I know, right? How amazing would it be if this worked out and the story of how I met my wife started with you and me in the hot tub together.
Howard: Well, do us both a favor and start the story later.

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Howard: Do you see anything that could help us locate her?
Bernadette: Hmm, let me have a look.
Howard: She's got eagle eyes, always spotting continuity errors in movies. (chuckles) It's not annoying at all.

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