Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 3 of 68

Searching Search quotes

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Howard: But this time-
Stuart: It was me. Yeah. I was trying out a flirty new smile.
Howard: Now, I don't use the word "ghoulish" a lot, but I-I just can't think of another word.

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Raj: Oh, this is the life. What could be better than this?
Howard: If you weren't wearing one of my swimsuits.
Raj: I'll give it back.
Howard: (chuckles) You know the rule. Once it touches hiney, it's no longer miney.

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Sheldon: No, that means it's Chinese food night.
Penny: Yeah, and you have Chinese food. So eat it.
Sheldon: But I can smell your pastrami.
Howard: And we can all hear your complaining, so no one's happy.

Quote from the episode The Bakersfield Expedition

Sheldon: I think you should turn on the GPS.
Leonard: It is on.
Sheldon: But the turn-by-turn voice option isn't on. I know I'd feel more safe if you turn on the turn-by-turn voice option. I love the turn-by-turn voice option.
Howard: Has it really only been ten miles?

Quote from the episode The Reclusive Potential

Raj: If Bruce Banner's driving a rental car and turns into the Hulk, do you think he's covered, or does he need to add the Hulk as an additional driver?
Howard: You really need a girlfriend.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: Why is Raj asleep on our couch?
Howard: Oh. I needed some help so he came by, played with the kids, read them some stories, put them down for their nap and made dinner.
Bernadette: What'd you do?
Howard: Ate dinner.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Well, I love the kids, but I also love my job. And sleep.
Bernadette: I know. I took a two-hour nap on the couch in my office.
Howard: I took a three-hour nap on the floor in the living room.
Bernadette: How do you feel now?
Howard: Honestly? Still tired.
Bernadette: Me, too.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Everyone's asleep. You want to head upstairs and (giggles) you know.
Bernadette: Let's just do it right here.
Howard: Oh, oh, I like the way you think. [They move a plate away, and both put their heads down to sleep]

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Bernadette's gonna be home soon. We got to divide and conquer. I'll make dinner. You watch the kids.
Raj: Uh, kids are asleep.
Howard: Great, then you make dinner.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Morning.
Bernadette: Hey, where you been?
Howard: Oh, nowhere special. Just the park, the farmer's market, then we hopped on the Gold Line to Chinatown because it's important for the kids to experience other cultures. What have you been doing?
Bernadette: It's 8:00 a.m. Sleeping.
Howard: Oh. So are the kids. I guess they take after you.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: You're just trying to prove that you'd do a better job than me.
Howard: You're pretty sharp having just woken up.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: You know, in fact, why don't you take the day off?
Bernadette: Mm, fine. Maybe I'll have lunch with Penny.
Howard: Take your time. Get a massage. You deserve it after all the sleep you've been getting.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Honestly, it's gonna be hard when we both go back to work. I've been thinking maybe it would be better if one of us decided to stay home.
Raj: I don't know, I was raised by servants, and look at me.
Howard: I literally can't tell if you think that's good or bad.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Howard: Here's my dilemma, I kind of want to stay home. But Bernadette is a way better parent than I am.
Raj: Wait, does Bernadette want to stay home?
Howard: I don't know. She's really invested in her career, and she's doing great. I think it should be me.

Quote from the episode The Athenaeum Allocation

Bernadette: I just love them so much.
Howard: Me, too. My heart feels like it's gonna explode. Of course, it's full of brisket, so it probably will.

Showing quotes 31 to 45 of 1,020Sort by  popularity | date added | episode