Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 4 of 68

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Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Leonard: So, any day now.
Howard: Oh, I don't know. We went to the doctor this morning, and she said it could still be another week or two.
Raj: How's Bernadette holding up?
Howard: It's pretty rough. She's having a hard time.
Leonard: Why are you smiling? I had sex twice last night.
Raj: That's not fair! She's on bed rest. She can't run away.
Howard: It was her idea. She read that it can start labor.
Raj: Hmm. Is that true?
Howard: Well, I would have Googled it, but I was busy taking my pants off.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Howard: I'm not gonna fight her. That kid's head was the size of a cantaloupe.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Howard: Honey, babies don't always come on their due date. Halley was two weeks late. [seeing Bernadette's stare] But this baby's a boy. They don't take as long to get ready.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: So you're saying everyone walks on eggshells to spare my feelings?
Howard: No, of course not, because we don't want to hear you complain about how much you hate the sound of crunching eggshells.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: I just learned some very distressing news. Sometimes, Amy doesn't do things because she's worried about how I'll react.
Howard: First of all, it's not sometimes, it's always.
Raj: Second, it's not Amy, it's everybody.
Howard: And third, it's not news, it's well-established.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: I know that you were on Wil's show, and I know why you didn't tell me.
Howard: Do you?
Sheldon: Because you were afraid that I would be difficult and annoying about it.
Howard: (chuckles) I hope your book has a twist as surprising as that.
Leonard: It doesn't.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: Howard, I want you to know that I forgive you.
Howard: I'll take it.
Leonard: What's he forgiving you for?
Howard: Don't care. Clean slate. Happy Yom Kippur to me.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Leonard: And then, when the lights come back on in the supercollider room, Dr. Logan Dean makes two important discoveries, gluino (gruffly) and murder.
Howard: Oh, gluino. That's exciting.
Leonard: (gruffly) And murder.
Howard: (gruffly) I heard you. The first time.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Howard: Hey, Professor Proton.
Wil Wheaton: Hey, thanks for being here.
Howard: No problem. I'm on my "launch" break.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Howard: For the record, I'm the one who introduced you to House of Pies.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Raj: I mean, do you think it's too soon for her to be dating? If you and Bernadette broke up, like, how long would you wait?
Howard: Oh, well, I don't even want to think-
Bernadette: Eight days.
Howard: What?
Bernadette: Two days to cry. Six days to hit the gym.
Howard: First of all, you already look amazing.
Bernadette: Aw, that's sweet.
Howard: I'm gonna give him an extra day of crying.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Raj: Guys, I mean, he's around, okay? He's apparently not happy about the breakup, and based on the sweatpants he left at her place, he's, like, a medium to large man.
Howard: Maybe those are his "after the holiday" pants, like you have.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Raj: I like her, okay? I just, I-I don't know how I feel about being the third wheel in a relationship.
Howard: Says the guy in my bed with my wife.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Raj: I met her at the planetarium a few days ago, and she invited me out for a drink.
Leonard: Oh, good for you. H-Hey, w-what's the Hindi word for "dog"?
Raj: Kutta.
Leonard: You kutta.
Raj: Bho.n, bho.n. (chuckles) That's Hindi for woof-woof.

Quote from the episode The Separation Triangulation

Howard: What are we looking at here?
Raj: Well, that's me and a beautiful woman and my watch showing the time as 2:30 in the morning.
Howard: So, state's "Exhibit A"?

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