Howard: Forty-three. What is forty-three? Besides my mom's neck size.
Raj: It's the atomic number for technetium.
Howard: That stuff's radioactive.
Raj: Do you think he's building a bomb?
Howard: It took him two years to put together that Lego Death Star. I'm not worried.

Raj: That's good quality video.
Howard: It better be. It's the same camera for the Mars rover.
Raj: How did you get your hands on that?
Howard: Million dollar camera. Ten dollar lock.

Howard: Oh, you like to fish?
Mike Rostenkowski: Yes.
Howard: Sure. I can hear it in your voice.
Mrs. Rostenkowski: Oh, if he didn't like it, he wouldn't go.
Howard: You know, I hadn't thought of that.

Howard: I really miss gravity. Can you drop something so I can watch it fall?
Bernadette: Really, you're serious? Okay.
Howard: Oh, baby, you're killing me.

Howard: Well, remember the Soyuz capsule they were sending to bring us home?
Bernadette: Uh huh.
Howard: It's delayed. We're gonna be here for at least another week. Maybe ten days. It's the Russians, so you don't know. They left dogs up here in the sixties.

Raj: Howard built a sex robot.
Howard: That is not true. All I did was build a robot.
Ms. Davis: Did it have six breasts?
Howard: I'm sorry, I'm a feminist, I don't notice things like how many breasts a robot has.

Howard: A few extra bucks would be nice. I could finally move out of my mother's house.
Raj: Where would you go?
Howard: I always dreamed about building a little place of my own over the garage.

Sheldon: She befriends them and then lies in wait until they reveal a marketable idea, which she steals and sells to the highest bidder.
Leonard: That's ridiculous.
Sheldon: Oh, is it? Well, let's see you come up with an explanation as to why this woman hangs out with us all the time.
Penny: Oh, great. You know what? I've already mooched dinner off you guys. I don't need to listen to this.
Howard: There's your answer: free food.

Stuart: "To Stuart, your comic book store is out of this world. Just like the guy in this picture was."
Sheldon: For the record, he also thinks Walgreens and the dry cleaners are out of this world.
Howard: That's not true. At Walgreens I was over the moon for their store-brand antacids.

Howard: I understand your point, but given a choice Jews always go with Chinese food.

Sheldon: I think the time has come to acknowledge that we are paying the price for some of us failing to attend my Physics Department paintball strategy meeting.
Howard: I told you, my mom has spider veins. I had to take her to the laser clinic.

Howard: Court-martial, shmort-martial, Leslie Winkle is the fifth girl I've ever had sex with. I mean, for free.
Raj: And plus, you got a rapid prototyper. That's an expensive piece of equipment, dude.
Leonard: And the rest of us have had our budgets cut to the bone.
Howard: Okay. One way to look at this is I'm getting new equipment and you're not, and that's unfair. But a better way to look at this is that I'm getting sex and you're not, and that's delightful.

Howard: Don't come in, Ma.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Why not?
Leslie: He's got company.
Howard: Oh, there's the arrhythmia.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Is she Jewish?
Howard: Are you Jewish?
Leslie: No.
Howard: Yes!

Howard: Raj is a proud, passionate man. If you go running out on him again, you're only gonna get like three of four more chances before you are history.

Sheldon: Howard, please. This is Stephen Hawking. Perhaps my only intellectual equal.
Howard: Oh, you can't be serious.