Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 58 of 77

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Quote from the episode The Escape Hatch Identification

Howard: I know if the roles were reversed, he would do it for me.
Bernadette: Where would he stay? We already have Stuart.
Howard: Well, we can make some space in the garage. Maybe put a cot out there, get him a space heater, maybe a hot plate.
Bernadette: That sounds awful.
Howard: Let's hope he thinks so, too.

Quote from the episode The Escape Hatch Identification

Raj: Hey, so, Howard, what's the bathroom situation gonna be?
Howard: Well, there's a sink out there, so that takes care of half your problems.

Quote from the episode The Escape Hatch Identification

Howard: Why are you asking all these questions?
Raj: Well, to be honest, Leonard's on the other line, and he offered me their spare bedroom.
Howard: Great! Go live there.
Raj: But you made the garage sound so fun.
Howard: I just didn't want you to feel bad about it. Unless Leonard's apartment also has a raccoon that chews its way in on cold nights, go there!

Quote from the episode The Collaboration Fluctuation

Howard: Nice. 174 diapers. That ought to get us to Wednesday.

Quote from the episode The Collaboration Fluctuation

Bernadette: Well, have you talked to them about it?
Leonard: Well, what am I supposed to say-- "Stop having fun without me"?
Howard: This one says that every time I go out. See? I listen to you.

Quote from the episode The Recollection Dissipation

Howard: Well, I know she's mad at me about something.
Stuart: Well, what have you done that would upset her?
Howard: Oh, gosh, how much time do you have?

Quote from the episode The Recollection Dissipation

Bernadette: I didn't want to tell you, but I'm having a really tough time about going back to work.
Howard: Oh. Okay, well, I get that. It was hard for me when I went back.
Bernadette: It was?
Howard: Of course. I missed you, and the baby, and being able to watch Ellen every day.

Quote from the episode The Cognition Regeneration

Howard: Okay, challenge them again.
Leonard: Doing it right now. Oh, they can't. There's an important Little League game tomorrow.
Howard: No wonder they beat us, they're jocks.

Quote from the episode The Cognition Regeneration

Howard: So the key is, the moment one ball is at the top of its arc, you toss the next one.
Sheldon: Okay, I think I got that.
Howard: Uh, h-hold on. There's an old saying in juggling.
Bernadette: Is it "I'm going to die alone"?
Howard: No, it's "if you want to have fun, start with one." Yours we think, but we do not say.

Quote from the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Howard: If you'd like, we can help you out.
Leonard: Oh, that would be great.
Howard: I mean, not me, I've got a wife and child, but this one posts video of himself flossing on Instagram.
Raj: It was a tutorial. And yes, I'm happy to keep Sheldon company.

Quote from the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Howard: We should call Guinness, that might be a record.

Quote from the episode The Speckerman Recurrence

Howard: Hey, we're here to support you, buddy.
Leonard: No, you're not. You're here to see if I get my underwear pulled over my head.
Howard: You wore underwear? You fool.

Quote from the episode The Wiggly Finger Catalyst

Leonard: Hey, how go the wedding plans, Howard?
Howard: Great. We spent five hours last night at Macy's registering for gifts. Looks like I'm finally going to have that darling little earthenware asparagus dish I've always wanted.

Quote from the episode The Wiggly Finger Catalyst

Howard: This is her car. She hopes she can see you again sometime.
Raj: Good, good. Oh, boy, help me out here. Does she want me to kiss her or not?
Howard: I speak sign language, I don't read minds.
Raj: If you were me, would you kiss her?
Howard: Yeah, but I'm a make out king.

Quote from the episode The Precious Fragmentation

Sheldon: We can't sell it. We have to keep it and love it and polish it, and only take it out occasionally when we go to the park and re-enact our favourite scenes from the movies.
Howard: It's sad how great that sounds.

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