Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 65 of 77
Quote from the episode The Higgs Boson Observation
Bernadette: Hey, Howie, how you feeling?
Wolowitz: Better. Much better. The other astronauts held me down, gave me a shot. Oooh. Attention, people of Earth. Tonight, there will be two moons in the sky.
Bernadette: Howie, stop that. NASA's watching this! Put your pants back on!
Quote from the episode The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem
Penny: Whats Sheldon's deal? Is it girls, guys, sock puppets?
Howard: We operate on the assumption that Sheldon has no deal. Though we have many theories about how he might reproduce. I'm an advocate of mitosis.
Penny: What?
Howard: I believe that one day Sheldon will eat an enormous amount of Thai food and spilt into two Sheldons.
Quote from the episode The Friendship Algorithm
Wolowitz: Have you thought about putting him in a crate when you're out of the apartment?
Quote from the episode The Shiny Trinket Maneuver
Wolowitz: My mother can be a pretty good shoulder to cry on. If the smell of Ben-Gay doesn't burn your eyes.
Quote from the episode The Hawking Excitation
Wolowitz: You don't seem to be understanding the English word no. Maybe a different language will help. Russian: Nyet. Chinese: Bu. Japanese: iie. Klingon: qo. Binary-coded ASCII: 01101110 01101111.
Sheldon: It's actually 01100111.
Quote from the episode The Hawking Excitation
Howard: Sheldon, you're a condescending jerk. Why on earth would I want to do something nice for you?
Sheldon: To go to Jewish heaven.
Howard: Jews don't have heaven.
Sheldon: To avoid Jewish hell?
Howard: Have you met my mother? I live in Jewish hell.
Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly
Wolowitz: Take your stinking paws off my popcorn, you damn dirty ape.
Quote from the episode The Weekend Vortex
Howard: Look, if you don't want to go to the party, just don't go. You're a grown man. Act like one. Tell Amy you want to spend the weekend having a sleepover and playing video games with your friends!
Quote from the episode The Weekend Vortex
Howard: Now, I downloaded an app that might be helpful in this situation.
[whip cracks]
Sheldon: You're right. I'm smart as a whip. I should be able to figure this out.
Quote from the episode The Werewolf Transformation
Howard: Sometime through the night an armadillo fell in, then he spooned me.
Quote from the episode The Werewolf Transformation
Wolowitz: I'm so dehydrated. My pee's like toothpaste.
Quote from the episode The Vacation Solution
Howard: Why don't I talk to him about it in May?
Bernadette: In May, you're gonna be on the International Space Station.
Howard: They got a phone.
Quote from the episode The Terminator Decoupling
Howard: You know the old saying: pasty and frail never fail.
Quote from the episode The Friendship Contraction
Howard: I got pretty exciting NASA news today. Next week I fly to Houston for orientation and zero-gravity elimination drills.
Penny: What does that mean?
Bernadette: He's gonna to learn to poop in space.
Howard: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
Raj: Maybe your nickname should be "Brown Dynamite."
Quote from the episode The Beta Test Initiation
Howard: [Chuckles] Look at that. There's finally a woman in your life you can talk to.
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