Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 74 of 77

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Quote from the episode The Meteorite Manifestation

Howard: So, is there anything we can do?
Nathan: Absolutely. Do you know if they have permits for the balcony?
Bernadette: Oh, no. We were hoping you could check.
Nathan: I certainly can. I just need you to fill out a form, and we have them available in Armenian, Chinese, Cambodian, English, Farsi, Korean, Spanish and Vietnamese.
Howard: Well, English, obviously.
Nathan: Well, we're not allowed to presume. That was a whole other meeting.

Quote from the episode The Meteorite Manifestation

Bernadette: So we just fill out the form and that's it?
Nathan: Oh, no. No, you need to fill it out, and then you need to bring it down to the Office of Code Compliance. Now, if your neighbors don't have a permit, you can file an official complaint, but if they do have a permit, then you have to make the case that the balcony constitutes a nuisance, an encumbrance or an encroachment, and you have to decide which, because they are three totally separate forms.
Howard: This is starting to seem like more trouble than it's worth.
Nathan: I know, right?

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Raj: So, this week would have been my wedding if Anu and I hadn't decided to slow things down.
Howard: Oh, yeah, I would have forgotten, except for those nonrefundable airline tickets to India I bought.
Raj: I'm sorry.
Howard: No, no. What's $3,000 between friends? Yeah, I probably would've just thrown it away on health care for my children.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Raj: Uh, if you still want to go, you can go to India and help my dad eat all the nonrefundable sushi.
Howard: Indian sushi? I need a change of underwear just thinking about that.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Howard: No, just the bachelor party I had planned. I thought we'd do it anyway.
Bernadette: Oh, so a guys' weekend?
Howard: Kinda. I mean, Sheldon and Leonard couldn't make it, so Raj invited Anu and I asked Stuart.
Bernadette: Wait, you invited Stuart before me?
Howard: Actually, I invited Bert before Stuart, but I don't know why I just told you that.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Bernadette: Why didn't you invite me?
Howard: Because I know you. You don't want to float weightless in an airplane.
Bernadette: What are you talking about? I love doing crazy stuff like that.
Howard: Bernie, you got sick from the teacup ride at Disneyland.
Bernadette: Lots of people do.
Howard: We were still in line.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Bernadette: So you don't want me to go?
Howard: No, I want you to go if you're gonna have fun. I don't want you to go if you're gonna be miserable and ruin it for everyone. Which is a long way of saying I want you to go!

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Bernadette: I'm a thrill-seeker, too. I've had to pull back since I became a mom, but I'll still jump on the back of a grocery cart and just roll through the meat section.
Howard: And I'm married to her, which is quite a ride.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Bernadette: Howie, I don't think I should do this.
Howard: Really? Well, I did not see that coming.

Quote from the episode The Donation Oscillation

Howard: But I've done this before. And since you really, really want to go, I'll stay here.
Bernadette: Oh. Great.
Howard: Unless you don't want to because I was right and I do know you.
Bernadette: Well, if you really know me, then you know how far I'll go to prove a point.
Howard: Apparently, 34,000 feet that way, then straight back down, up and down, over and over again until you throw up food you didn't even eat.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Howard: That's time.
Sheldon: Oh, really? Can we do one more?
Howard: I think these guys need to get some food.
Sheldon: By pushing a lever at the end of an obstacle course that we design?
Howard: No, by opening the door to a hangar and letting the airplane fly in.

Quote from the episode The D & D Vortex

Wil Wheaton: Hello.
Howard: [imitating Shatner] Wil, Bill Shatner here.
Wil Wheaton: Is this Howard?
Howard: Of course not. It- It's Shatner. If you don't believe me, ask my good friend, Christopher Walken. [imitating Walken] Hello, Bill and I are just hanging out at The Polo Lounge.
Raj: Mr. Shatner, Mr. Walken, here are your martinis. [glass dings]
Howard: [whispering in normal voice] What are you doing?
Raj: I'm filling out the world.
Howard: You're ruining it.
Wil Wheaton: No, he's not.
Raj: Thanks, Wil.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Bernadette: Now, the emergency contacts are on the fridge and I left money for food on the table.
Howard: Oh, sounds like I do get paid.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Howard: Don't worry. I got this covered.
Bernadette: I know you do. Quick question, where are the kids right now?
Howard: They're upstairs.
Bernadette: They're at daycare.
Howard: They're at daycare?
Bernadette: They're upstairs!
Howard: Why are you messing with me?

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Howard: What do you say? We'll play some board games. It'll be like a party.
Leonard: Three guys playing a board game doesn't sound like much of a party.
Howard: [chuckles] Someone doesn't remember college very well.

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