Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 3 of 82

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Quote from the episode The Inspiration Deprivation

Bebe: All right, are you ready?
Leonard: I'm not saying this is why we came, but can I close the lid on him?
Bebe: No. [Leonard tries to hand her money] No.

Quote from the episode The Inspiration Deprivation

Penny: Okay, well, what about Reiki? It's like massage but without touching.
Sheldon: Then what is it?
Penny: Well, I place my hands near your body and allow the universal energy field to manifest its healing powers. Okay, I know it sounds crazy, but it really works; ask Leonard.
Leonard: It really does.
Penny: Yeah.
Leonard: [mouths] No.

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Penny: Uh-oh. I haven't been to a lot of parties like this, but what does a physics rumble look like?
Leonard: Kind of like angry chickens. Hmm. Or-or-or-or like, uh, when-when puppets fight.

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Leonard: Professor Thorne?
Kip Thorne: Dr. Hofstadter.
Leonard: Uh, you know my wife, Penny.
Kip Thorne: Sure. Hi.
Penny: Hi.
Leonard: Uh, we wanted to talk to you about Dr. Cooper. Now, before you say no-
Kip Thorne: No.
Leonard: Well, then, after you say no.
Kip Thorne: No.

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Sheldon: See, sometimes I wish I could invent a time machine, so I could go back and prevent myself from acting so rashly.
Leonard: Or moving forward, you could think before you speak.
Sheldon: I suppose so.
Leonard: But the time machine thing is probably more likely.

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Sheldon: Well, it's true. The fact is, I feel really bad for Amy.
Leonard: Well, we all do. But just for fun, why do you?

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Leonard: You want to tell me what's going on?
Sheldon: Is my distress that obvious?
Leonard: Sheldon, please don't take this the wrong way, but when you're quiet even for a second, something's wrong.

Quote from the episode The Laureate Accumulation

Penny: Someone texting you?
Leonard: Uh, no, I just met my exercise goal for the day.
Penny: By doing the dishes?
Leonard: Hey, you have your goals, I have mine.
Sheldon: Hello.
Amy: What are you two doing?
Leonard: Mm, just finishing a workout.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Leonard: Oh, my God. At sleepaway camp my cabin was called "Control Group."

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Howard: Engage them for a minute and take note of their reactions.
Leonard: There's something familiar about all this.
Howard: Okay, go.
Sheldon: Hello, baby. Are you having a pleasant day?
Leonard: Oh, my G-- This is my entire childhood.
Sheldon: Leonard, Leonard, you're tainting my data.
Leonard: Uh, it's like word for word.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Sheldon: So, your convention is in San Diego, right?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: Great. I need you to settle a bet for Amy and me.
Amy: I say, when it's not Comic-Con, no one will be dressed as superheroes.
Sheldon: Mm-hmm. And I say fewer people will be dressed as superheroes but still some.
Amy: A crazy person in a cape doesn't count.
Leonard: Mm, why not? It counts at Comic-Con.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Sheldon: Oh, thank goodness! I caught you before you left.
Penny: I'm just going for the weekend.
Leonard: Just the weekend. You all heard her say it.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Leonard: I love you.
Penny: I love you, too.
Leonard: And you're gonna do great. Just relax, stay out of your head, and try to enjoy it.
Penny: Aw. That reminds me of what I said to you the first time we slept together.
Leonard: I still use it. It's a mantra.

Quote from the episode The Conference Valuation

Leonard: Wow. That's a lot of luggage for a weekend.
Penny: I know. I didn't know what to wear, so I brought a few options.
Leonard: Was one of the options the option to never come back?

Quote from the episode The D & D Vortex

Leonard: All right, I'll tell you. Uh, [stammers] Kevin Smith was there, and-and, uh, this really tall guy named Kareem.
Penny: Wait-wait, K-Kareem Abdul-Jabbar?
Leonard: I don't know, it was, uh, Kareem something Jabbar. How do you know him
Penny: How do you not know him?
Leonard: Well, I know him now 'cause he was there.

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