Countdown to the series finale: 28 days

Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 77 of 79

Searching Search quotes

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Raj: Seriously, Leonard, you didn't pick my project?
Leonard: I'm sorry, Raj.
Howard: Did you go with Crow Lady?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: You gave the money to Kripke?
Leonard: I did not.
Raj: Wait, I'm confused. I thought there were only three projects in contention.
Leonard: There were. But, at the last minute, someone submitted an application for a pretty cool europium-doped laser, and they made a very compelling case.
Howard: What was the case?
Leonard: Oh, that it was me and I wanted it.
Raj: You-you can't do that. You can't just fund your own project.
Leonard: Uh, it turns out I can, and I did.

Quote from the episode The Fetal Kick Catalyst

Leonard: Wow! An appearance by George Lucas's ... dermatologist. Oh, I want that autograph.
Penny: Oh, yeah.

Quote from the episode The Bus Pants Utilization

Leonard: Look, I'm still happy to drive you to work. Nothing's changed in that regard. We're still roommates. We're still friends.
Sheldon: Except you identified me, your best friend, as a gangrenous limb that needed to be severed from the organism and tossed away. The desperate act of a little man with a big Napoleon complex.
Leonard: You know what? Go put on your bus pants.

Quote from the episode The Consummation Deviation

Raj: Hey, you guys have any plans for Valentine's Day?
Leonard: Three months from now? No.
Penny: What? No?
Leonard: I mean, secret romantic plans that would be ruined if I told you.
Bernadette: What's going on, Raj?
Raj: Well, how would you guys feel about going to India for my wedding?
Amy: Oh, that's so exciting!
Leonard: Penny, you will never guess what I have planned for Valentine's Day.

Quote from the episode The Confirmation Polarization

Penny: You know, it was nice of Bernadette to offer, but I'm not sure it's the right move for me.
Leonard: Well, what are you talking about? If you were in charge of her project, wouldn't that be a promotion?
Penny: Well, yeah, but it's not the most important thing. Aren't you always saying it's about the work, not more money or a better title?
Leonard: All the smart things I say, and you remember the dumb one.

Quote from the episode The Confirmation Polarization

Penny: Plus, I'd be working for Bernadette. I don't know if that's a good idea.
Leonard: Look, I-I know she can be difficult, but she's no match for you. Whatever she dishes out, you can give it right back double.
Penny: What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Leonard: There you go.

Quote from the episode The Fetal Kick Catalyst

Penny: Leonard, it's sweet you're excited about this, but it'll be a miracle if one person asks for my autograph.
Leonard: Are you kidding? I once paid $20 for Theo Sassler's signature.
Penny: Who's that?
Leonard: Oh, I don't even know. I just liked his name. Theo Sassler!

Quote from the episode The Fetal Kick Catalyst

Leonard: Oh, and look at this. I even got a change maker. How much change you want, little lady?
Penny: Oh, there's so much I want to change.
Leonard: Yeah, well, if it's a dollar, you're in luck.

Quote from the episode The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis

Dave: I don't know how you live next door to that without doing something about it.
Leonard: Actually, science is my lady.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Leonard: Compromise. Watch Babylon 5.
Sheldon: In what sense is that a compromise?
Leonard: Well, five is partway between three... Never mind.

Quote from the episode The Good Guy Fluctuation

(After Sheldon passes out after the Halloween prank)
Howard: who had there money on faint?
Raj: I had pee his pants.
Leonard: Hang on, looks like everyone's a winner.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Howard: Hello, boys.
Leonard: Ahoy, matey.
Howard: Noticed the eye patch, did you? It's all part of a technique I've been studying for picking up women. You employ a visual display designed to make yourself distinctive and memorable.
Sheldon: Oh yes, like the male peacock with brilliant plumage or the rutting baboon with engorged hindquarters.
Leonard: Or in this case, the bar mitzvah boy with pinkeye.

Quote from the episode The Table Polarization

Penny: Translation?
Leonard: Wah, I don't want a table.

Quote from the episode The Jiminy Conjecture

Penny: What did you tell them?
Leonard: Nothing bad, just that last night was fine.
Penny: Fine? You said it was fine?
Leonard: Yeah, it's a perfectly good word. You put it in front of wine or dining, and you've really got something.

Quote from the episode The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis

Leonard: I've been offering to show you around for a year and a half. You always said you had yoga.
Penny: I never said that.
Leonard: Maybe I heard you wrong. A lot of words sound like yoga.

Showing quotes 1,141 to 1,155 of 1,184Sort by  popularity | date added | episode