Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 77 of 82

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Quote from the episode The Santa Simulation

Leonard: Oh, before I forget, Saturday I'm planning a little Dungeons and Dragons night with the guys.
Penny: Really? That's how you're gonna spend your Saturday night?
Leonard: Oh, come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play anymore.
Penny: Oh, you poor thing. Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games?
Leonard: Little bit, yeah.

Quote from the episode The Extract Obliteration

Penny: Okay, listen, there's something I need to tell you. I've been thinking about going back to school for a while now. So a couple months ago, I started taking a history class at the community college.
Leonard: Oh. That's great. Great, great, great. Why wait so long to tell me?
Penny: I don't want you to make a big deal out of it.
Leonard: Why do you think I'd be like that? I get it, you're taking one class. It's nice. Maybe if it goes well, you take another, you enroll full-time. Ooh, be sure to keep an eye on which credits transfer to a four-year college.
Penny: You're making it a big deal.
Leonard: Sorry. (nonchalantly) Whatever. It's all good.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Conclusion

Penny: Or you accomplished something great, and she's genuinely proud.
Leonard: [taking Penny's wine glass] Yeah, all right, you've had enough.

Quote from the episode The Plimpton Stimulation

Leonard: Hi-lo. Oops. I started to say hi and then I switched to hello in the middle. It came out hi-lo. Duh. Uh, it's nice to meet you. I've read both your books and most of your papers. I'm Leonard, I live here. You're brilliant.
Sheldon: I apologize. He's only an experimental physicist.
Elizabeth: No need to apologize. Some of my best friends are experimental physicists. Well, not my best friends, but I know them. My best friend is a molecular chemist named Wendy. I'm sorry, I'm rambling. Hi-lo.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Penny: Wait, wait, just to be clear, when you guys say spa, does that mean the same thing as when regular people say it?
Leonard: Pretty much. Except we keep our shirts on in the sauna.

Quote from the episode The Extract Obliteration

Penny: Now behave yourself and eat your dinner. Maybe later, if you're lucky, you get to sleep with a college girl.
Leonard: Really? 'cause I went to four years of college and five years of grad school, that never happened once.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Bernadette: But this is good so far, really good.
Leonard: Yeah?
Bernadette: Yeah. I have no idea who the killer is.
Leonard: Oh, great. Me, neither.

Quote from the episode The Gyroscopic Collapse

Leonard: So, are you excited to have your own place again?
Raj: I am, but I'll miss you guys.
Leonard: Ah, we'll miss you, too.
Raj: Well, you could try saying that without smiling.
Leonard: I'm trying. This is the best I can do.

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Leonard: I found another tweet from a student at Sheldon's lecture. Dr. Cooper has taken a relatively boring subject and managed to make it completely insufferable. Plus, he looks like a giant insect.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: Okay, I just- I need everyone to back off. I'm in charge here, and I'll decide when I'm ready to decide.
Raj: When will that be?
Leonard: A day, a week. I don't know!
Raj: Where are you going?
Leonard: I don't know that either!

Quote from the episode The Extract Obliteration

Leonard: It's like when I started doing chin-ups. I didn't want you to see until I could do one. FYI, really close.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Howard: I don't know what my next move is.
Leonard: Well, Howard, I don't know much about women.
Howard: Yeah?
Leonard: No, uh, that, that's it. I don't know much about women.

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Penny: Hey, Leonard, is your wi-fi down? I can't get on.
Leonard: Oh, Sheldon changed the password. It's now Penny is a freeloader. No spaces.

Quote from the episode The Bath Item Gift Hypothesis

Leonard: Here's my home number, here's my cell, here's my office, here's my parents' number up in New Jersey, they always know how to reach me.

Quote from the episode The Desperation Emanation

Howard: What's with the T-shirt? You working at the Apple store now?
Leonard: No, it's just something I threw on.
Howard: I know all your shirts. That's not one of them. You were pretending to work at the Genius Bar to pick up women, weren't you?
Leonard: Yeah. Turns out, they guard the iPods, but they don't guard the shirts.
Howard: So, how'd it go?
Leonard: It was going well. I was showing this super hot girl how to boot up in Safe Mode. The manager got suspicious, and, well, long story short, they really do have a little jail in the mall.

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