Leonard Hofstadter Quotes Page 80 of 82

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Quote from the episode The Robotic Manipulation

Leonard: The robot hand got stuck on your what?

Quote from the episode The Cushion Saturation

Penny: Ok, ok, how about this. We tell him somebody broke in?
Leonard: Just to shoot the couch with the paint ball gun?
Penny: I'm sorry, I'll buy it. All those people are on drugs.
Leonard: We can tell him they wanted the couch to stay away from their boyfriend.

Quote from the episode The Euclid Alternative

Sheldon: Leonard, have you ever wondered why my little toes and lateral incisors are significantly smaller than the average for someone of my size?
Leonard: I wonder a lot of things about you, Sheldon, but not that.

Quote from the episode The Peanut Reaction

Leonard: My parents focused on celebrating achievements and being expelled from a birth canal was not considered one of them.

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Leonard: Can I go back and prevent you from explaining that to me?
Sheldon: Same paradox. If you were to travel back in time and, say, knock me unconscious, you would not then have the conversation that irritated you, motivating you to go back and knock me unconscious.
Leonard: What if I knock you unconscious now?
Sheldon: It won't change the past.
Leonard: But it'd make the present so much nicer.

Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Raj: How about Lasik?
Leonard: You want me to get eye surgery?
Raj: Would you rather go back to the apartment and deal with Sheldon or have a stranger carve out your corneas with a laser beam?
Howard: Well?
Leonard: I'm thinking.

Quote from the episode The Middle-Earth Paradigm

Leonard: I call Frodo!
Sheldon, Raj, and Howard: Damn!

Quote from the episode The Precious Fragmentation

Leonard: *Doing Mr. T impression while holding a action figure of Spock with Mr. T's head* I pity the fool who's illogical!

Quote from the episode The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Sheldon: Wait, put this in the bathroom.
Leonard: What for?
Sheldon: I need to measure my fluid intake and output to make sure my kidneys aren't shutting down.
Leonard: I mix pancake batter in this!
Sheldon: No, that measuring cup has always been for urine.
Leonard: You had time to make a label for everything in this apartment, including the label maker, but you didn't have ten seconds to make a label that said "urine cup"?
Sheldon: It's right here on the bottom.
Leonard: Huh, I guess I owe the Betty Crocker Company a letter of apology.

Quote from the episode The Pants Alternative

Sheldon: Oh Lord, this can't be more humiliating.
Leonard: No, no, no, give him a minute.

Quote from the episode The Pants Alternative

Sheldon: Where are my pants?
Leonard: You might wanna check out YouTube.

Quote from the episode The Pants Alternative

Sheldon: What self-important preening fraud are they honoring this year?
Leonard: I'm so glad you asked it like that. You!

Quote from the episode The Middle-Earth Paradigm

Penny: God, what is wrong with me.
Leonard: Nothing, you're perfect.
Penny: Gah, I'm not perfect.
Leonard: Yes you are.
Penny: You really think so, don't you? [kisses Leonard]
Leonard: Penny?
Penny: Yeah.
Leonard: How much have you had to drink tonight?
Penny: Just…. a lot.
Leonard: Are you sure that your being drunk, and your being angry with Kurt doesn't have something to do with what's going on here?
Penny: It might. Boy, you're really smart.
Leonard: Yeah, I'm a frickin' genius.

Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm

Wolowitz: Leonard, how was your date?
Leonard: Bite me!

Quote from the episode The Einstein Approximation

Leonard: Black beans, not pinto beans?
Sheldon: Yes.
Leonard: Double guacamole?
Sheldon: Of course.
Leonard: Lettuce shredded, not chopped?
Sheldon: Yes.
Leonard: No cilantro?
Sheldon: Nope.
Leonard: You understand why I'm doing this to you?
Sheldon: I do.
Leonard: That will be all.

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