Mary Cooper Quotes Page 6 of 7

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Quote from the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Mary Cooper: If you recall, when you were little we sat right here at this very spot and talked about some of the problems you had getting along with the neighbor kids.
Sheldon: That was different. They were threatened by my intelligence and too stupid to know that's why they hated me.
Mary Cooper: Oh, baby. They knew very well why they hated you.

Quote from the episode The Mommy Observation

Sheldon: Well then why are you doing it?
Mary: Because I'm not perfect, Shelly. And that man's booty is.

Quote from the episode The Mommy Observation

Sheldon: Well, this is confusing for me. But I don't want to stand in the way of your happiness. So, I will condemn you internally while maintaining an outward appearance of acceptance.
Mary: That is very Christian of you.

Quote from the episode The Mommy Observation

Sheldon: I should let you know the world has changed since you were a young woman. It's not all sock hops, soda jerks and segregation any more.
Mary: How old do you think I am?

Quote from the episode The Mommy Observation

Sheldon: Can you recommend a surface you haven't had coitus on?
Mary: That's not funny. ... Maybe we should sit at the table.

Quote from the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Mrs. Cooper: By His hand we are all
Sheldon: Fed.
Mrs. Cooper: Give us, Lord, our daily
Sheldon: Bread.
Mrs. Cooper: Please know that we are truly
Sheldon: Grateful.
Mrs .Cooper: For every cup and every
Sheldon: Plateful.
Mrs. Cooper: Amen.

Quote from the episode The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation

Sheldon: What are they doing here?
Leonard: We came to apologize again and bring you home. So why don't you pack up your stuff, and we'll head back?
Sheldon: No, this is my home now. Thanks to you, my career is over, and I will spend the rest of my life here in Texas trying to teach evolution to creationists.
Mrs. Cooper: You watch your mouth, Shelly. Everyone's entitled to their opinion.
Sheldon: But evolution is not opinion, it's a fact.
Sheldon's mom: And that is your opinion.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Mary Cooper: When I was your age you could have me for a car ride and a bottle of strawberry wine.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Mary Cooper: It's all themed. There's Jonah and the Whale Watching. All-you-can-eat Last Supper Buffet. And my personal favorite, Gunning with God.

Quote from the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Mary: He gets his temper from his daddy.
Leonard: Ah!
Mary: He's got my eyes.
Leonard: I see!
Mary: All that science stuff, that comes from Jesus.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Mary: Just because a cat's got kittens in the oven doesn't make 'em biscuits.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Mary: Back home, there's a woman works at the Wal-Mart - tall, tall girl. Woman could hunt geese with a rake.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Mary: Oh, it is a hoot and a half. You write your sins on a clay pigeon, they fire 'em up in the air and you pulverize 'em with a twelve gage shotgun full of our Lord's forgiveness.

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Leonard: What did you think of the sushi?
Mary: It was good. Only thing - would have made it better if it was cooked - and if it was beef!

Quote from the episode The Rhinitis Revelation

Sheldon: That reminds me of another saying: You can lead a chicken to Crisco, but you can't make your mother fry it.
Mary Cooper: Sheldon, you pester me one more time about chicken and I will put you over my knee right here in this restaurant.
Leonard: Please pester her? Please? For me.

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