Penny: Hey, Leonard, if you're not busy tomorrow, I have to do a little reception after work.
Leonard: Oh, I would, but we need to make a push on the air force project.
Penny: Oh, are you sure? We're celebrating our new A.D.D. drug, and it'll probably be over in, like, six minutes.

Raj: Wait a minute. Hey, let me see your phone.
Sheldon: Why?
Raj: Well, it's possible it was tracking everywhere you went.
Amy: Phones can do that?
Raj: Yeah, it depends on the privacy settings.
Penny: Oh, tha- that's so cool. How do you- how do you turn that thing off? (laughing nervously)
Leonard: Relax. I know when you "go for a run," you stop for a donut.
Penny: I don't even run there, I drive.

Leonard: Don't you have any friends he can date?
Penny: Hey, I already set up Howard and Bernadette. It's your turn to ruin some poor girl's life.

Raj: I feel bad for Bert.
Sheldon: So he's using his money to attract a mate. Is that any different than me using my intelligence to attract Amy? Or Leonard using his power of groveling to get Penny?
Leonard: It's totally different. Bert's money might run out, but I can beg until the end of time.
Penny: All that, and he's shorter than me.

Zack: Penny?
Penny: Oh, Zack. Hey.
Zack: What are the odds of running into you here?
Penny: Well, it's a bar, so pretty good.

Zack: How about you? Hey, how's Leonard? Is he still smart?
Penny: Yes, yes, he's working for the government on an infinite persistence gyroscope. Of course, the first time I say it right, he's not even here.

Penny: Hey, you ready to go?
Leonard: Yeah, I guess.
Penny: What's the matter?
Leonard: Honestly? It's a little strange having dinner with your ex-boyfriend, and it's not like we have a lot to talk about.
Penny: What? He loves you, okay? And he's interested in your work. You could talk about the infinite perspective -- I swear I know it.

Leonard: You're not really considering working for him, are you?
Penny: Well, maybe, I mean, it seems kind of perfect. I have sales experience, and I've been a waitress, so I have restaurant experience, and if he's figuring out my Christmas bonus, we could buy a boat.

Bernadette: I would never let Howard work with an ex.
Penny: What, you wouldn't trust him?
Bernadette: I wouldn't trust her. He's thin and sexy like a Jewish greyhound.
Penny: Yeah, that - that is the sexiest dog.

Raj: Well, I may be moving out soon. I think I found a place to live.
Penny: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Raj: Really? You kept sending me apartment listings.
Penny: Um, well, I- Yeah, you got me.

Bernadette: You're still gonna go, right?
Amy: I don't know. Sheldon's so vulnerable right now.
Penny: Oh, come on. Look, if the roles were reversed, he'd be on the first train to New Jersey. Or the second train if there were teenagers on the first one.

Penny: All right, then we agree. He's not making any moves, it's this Dr. Ramona chick.
Bernadette: Nowitzki. I Googled her, she's pretty cute.
Penny: Really? All I got from Leonard was the Toblerone bar had nuts.

Leonard: How was Nebraska?
Penny: Oh, better than North Dakota! [silence] I guess that joke's only funny in Nebraska.
Sheldon: From the data at hand you really can't draw that conclusion. All you can say with absolute certainty is that that joke is not funny here.
Penny: Boy, it's good to be back.

Penny: Spaghetti okay?
Leonard: It's crunchy. Just the way I like it.
Penny: Yeah, I don't think the water was really boiling.

Leonard: Am I allowed to ask how the class is going?
Penny: It's really good. We've been talking about the origins of slavery. Turn in my first paper tomorrow.
Leonard: Great topic. I can help with that. There are lots of different perspectives you can take, economic, sociological, political.
Penny: Hey hey hey, this is my paper. And my perspective is that slavery is bad. Oh, and my professor's black, so I'm pretty sure thats the right answer.