Penny: I got a new bikini. The drinks at the pool will be brought to you by these.

Sheldon: I've never played Dungeons and Dragons with girls.
Penny: It's okay, honey, no one has.

Penny: Oh, it's not so bad. You lost money, you're filled with shame, and you got groped by a stranger. That's Vegas. You nailed it.

Penny: Okay, who wants a drink?
Sheldon: Now, Penny, we don't consume alcohol during Dungeons & Dragons. It impairs our judgment.
Penny: Oh, this isn't alcohol. It's a magic potion that makes me like you.
Leonard: Double potion, please.

Penny: You know what? Give me the dice, I want to roll.
Howard: The dungeon master's supposed to roll.
Penny: Yeah, well Im supposed to be in Vegas throwing up on a shrimp buffet. Now give it.

Penny: Fifteen's the point, the point is fifteen. Give the little lady some room. Here it is, coming out. Sixteen! Yes! Oh, please tell me we're playing for money.
Sheldon: Oh, even better than money. You gained experience points.
Penny: More potion, please.

Leonard: All right, Amy, there's one ogre left. Take him out.
Amy: Okay.
Penny: Pretend he's that TSA agent. Come on.
Amy: Nineteen. Yes, this is turning out to be even better than Vegas.
Penny: No, it's not.

Penny: But if you dont mind me asking, uh, the potato clock, how does it work? Is it a trick clock or a trick potato?

Sheldon: Professor Proton hosted my favorite science show when I was a child. I never missed an episode. He demonstrated scientific principles using everyday objects.
Leonard: It was pretty cool.
Penny: Aw, it's so cute when you use the word cool wrong. Like when kids say pasgetti.

Leonard: The interface is pretty simple. You put your horizontal X coordinate here, vertical Y coordinate here. When you're happy with those, you press this button.
Penny: Got it.
Sheldon: Leonard, you'll never guess who I just found online. (A foam missile fires at Sheldon) Hey!
Leonard: Nice shot.
Penny: Eh, his giant head did most of the work.
Sheldon: Very mature. You're lucky I'm out of silly string.

Penny: Yeah, it was fun. Kind of reminded me of my high school. But instead of vampires, we had meth heads. But both came out at night and had messed up teeth.

Sheldon: No, that's the season two finale. That was quite the cliffhanger. I'm going to re-watch it before season three starts.
Leonard: There is no season three. They canceled that show.
Sheldon: Well, they can't cancel it. It ended on a cliffhanger.
Leonard: They did.
Penny: Uh, Sheldon, there are two dumplings left. Do you want them?
Sheldon: Dumplings? Don't you understand what's going on here?
Penny: As a rule, no.

Leonard: I think you'll like the next one better. All the cheerleaders are suffering from an evil curse.
Penny: Oh. Well, that's like my high school, too. But instead of a curse, it was crabs.

Penny: Okay, help me out here. Why does he love this show so much?
Bernadette: Well, there was action, it was funny. I mean, you do get that usually the monster chases the pretty girl, but this time the pretty girl chases the monsters?
Penny: Yippee, it's backwards. I get it.

Penny: I wish I had some of that fire in my life. I mean, I want to care about things and get excited like you guys.
Bernadette: Well, there's no reason you cant.
Penny: You think?
Bernadette: Absolutely. All we need to do is spend a little time and find something you're passionate about.
Penny: Ugh, that sounds like a lot of work.