Penny: Yeah, no more stories about sex, so, Amy, that brings us to you.
Amy: Well, at work we've been doing some interesting research with neuroprosthetics.
Penny: Neat. I've been rewatching The O.C., so we're all leading productive lives.

Penny: Bernadette left it here.
Leonard: Yeah? Anything interesting?
Penny: Well, I just saw a picture of a baby's head crowning, so I hope you enjoyed sex, because we're done with that.

Amy: Ladies night at the Cheesecake Factory. Does it get any better than this?
Penny: I hope so.
Amy: Question. Do you think your husband's fondness for turtlenecks is an expression of longing for his missing foreskin?
Penny: It's not getting any better.

Penny: Ugh, it's Leonard. He wants to go costume shopping later.
Bernadette: I thought you liked Halloween.
Penny: I do, it's just he wants to go to that party at the comic book store. A lot of the guys that hang out there are kind of creepy.
Bernadette: Like my husband?
Amy: And my boyfriend?
Penny: I'm-I'm sorry. Amy, you were saying something about Howard's foreskin?

Penny: I guess I could probably try a little harder.
Bernadette: You could start by taking an interest in his work.
Penny: Yeah, that's kind of a problem.
Amy: Why?
Penny: Not really clear on what he does.
Bernadette: He's an experimental physicist.
Penny: Yeah, I'm not really clear on what that means.
Amy: He takes hypotheses and designs protocols to determine their accuracy.
Penny: Yeah, you're really just making it worse.

Leonard: Oh, no, no, no, don't look in there.
Penny: What, is it secret?
Leonard: No, it's a nitrogen laser. It'll cook your eyeball like a soft-boiled egg.
Penny: Oh. You might want to put a sign on it.
Leonard: Sign right there.
Penny: Ah. Danger. Sure, sure.

Penny: What's-what's that?
Leonard: Uh, that is an integrated ion trap and time-of-flight mass spectrometer.
Penny: Wow. High-techie-techie. What's this little box?
Leonard: That is a pencil sharpener.
Penny: Ooh, low-techie-techie.

Penny: So, what are you working on right now?
Leonard: It's actually pretty neat.
Penny: Yeah?
Leonard: Yeah. It's a front-projected holographic display combined with laser-based finger tracking. Here, I'll show you. We'll just put this pencil over here.
Penny: Sharp. Thanks to the machine we saw earlier.

Leonard: And then a laser will map the reflective surface, and voila. (A floating 3-D image of the pencil appears. Leonard moves it around with his finger)
Penny: Wow. That is amazing.
Leonard: You know, there's a foundational idea in string theory that the whole universe may be a hologram.
Penny: What do you mean? (Leonard flicks a switch. The hologram changes to a view of the planet Earth). Oh, wow!
Leonard: Uh-huh. Well, the holographic principle suggests that what we all experience every day in three dimensions may really (changes projection to the solar system) just be information (changes the projection to the galaxy) on a surface located at the farthest reaches of our cosmos. (Sets the galaxy spinning) So it's possible that our lives are really just acting out a painting on the largest canvas in the universe.
Penny: Hmm.
Leonard: What?
Penny: Sometimes I forget how smart you are.
Leonard: You should visit more often.

Penny: Whoa! That is very cool.
Leonard: Sometimes I like to turn this on and pretend I'm the super villain Magneto.
Penny: Getting a little less cool, Leonard.
Leonard: But what I really am is a very smart scientist who understands the mechanics of the universe and is wearing the sexy black underwear you bought him.
Penny: There we go.

Penny: Trust me, you guys have nothing to worry about. You know, back in Nebraska, I raised all our baby pigs right until the day they were slaughtered. So, unless your baby's made of breakfast meat, she's fine.

Raj: I came here to celebrate! Yeah. I went back to the planetarium and told them they were making a huge mistake, that I'd be perfect for the job. I was I was charming, I was confident. And they gave it to me.
Penny: Wow.
Leonard: (chuckles) That's amazing!
Raj: Yeah, plus, it turns out the guy they hired got busted at a sketchy massage parlor.
Penny: Oh, so happy ending for you! Oh, and for him.

Leonard: The interface is pretty simple. You put your horizontal X coordinate here, vertical Y coordinate here. When you're happy with those, you press this button.
Penny: Got it.
Sheldon: Leonard, you'll never guess who I just found online. (A foam missile fires at Sheldon) Hey!
Leonard: Nice shot.
Penny: Eh, his giant head did most of the work.
Sheldon: Very mature. You're lucky I'm out of silly string.

Penny: Oh, my God, I screwed up everything. I hurt Leonard, I hurt Raj, I mean, what is wrong with me? I feel like two totally different people, Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Whore.

Penny: You know, I've done this before. In kindergarten, I was supposed to marry Jason Sorensen at recess, but by the time my class got out there, he was already engaged to Chelsea Himmelfarb. So what did I do? Hung upside down from the monkey bars, let all the boys see my underpants.