Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 54 of 60

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Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment

Penny: Anybody need a refill?
Raj: (Drunk) Where did my life go, Penny?
*Everyone realizes Raj spoke to Penny.*
Raj: One day, I'm a carefree bachelor, the next, I'm driving a minivan to peewee cricket matches in suburban New Delhi.
Penny: Are you talking to me?
Raj: Is there another Penny here?

Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment

Mrs. Koothrappali: What are we suppose to tell Lalita's parents?
Dr. Koothrappali: I play golf with her father, I won't be able to look at him.
Raj: Why don't you keep your eye on the ball, Papa?

Quote from the episode The Gorilla Experiment

Raj: Ha-ha! Eat my dust, racially stereotypical plumber.
Sheldon: That's not fair! I got stuck behind a tree.
Raj: And a cow, and a penguin. Face it dude, whether it's a real car or a virtual car, you can't drive.
Sheldon: Just need a little more practice.
Raj: What you need is cheat codes, motor skills and a genie who grants wishes to little boys who sucks at MarioKart.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Raj: (Mocking Howard) Ooh! Look at me, I don't have a foreskin!

Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment

Dr. Koothrappali: Tilt up the camera, I'm looking at his crotch.
Raj: Sorry, Papa!
Dr. Koothrappali: Oh, there's much better. Hi.

Quote from the episode The Cornhusker Vortex

Raj: You always do this, you know, ditch me for a woman you don't have a shot with.
Howard: I totally had a shot.
Raj: With a woman you were chasing in a park. That's not a shot, that's a felony.

Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution

Howard: What do you mean you didn't get the job? How could you not get it?
Raj: You know, he's British, I'm Indian. Ever since Gandhi, they haven't liked us very much.
Leonard: Are you saying that he discriminated against you? Because we should file a complaint.
Raj:That's okay, a complaint's been filed.

Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution

Raj: I don't wanna go back to India, it's hot and loud, and there are so many people! You have no idea, they're everywhere.

Quote from the episode The Financial Permeability

Raj: If anyone cares, I still have to pee.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Raj: You think your thoughts are pure gold, but let me tell you something they are pure caca.

Quote from the episode The Griffin Equivalency

Raj: So, Saturday night. Can I count on my posse?
Howard: Jeez, I'd love to Raj but I can't make it.
Raj: Ah, okay, Leonard?
Leonard: Oh, ah, oh, I can ... no.
Raj: Sheldon?
Sheldon: I can make it but I won't.

Quote from the episode The Herb Garden Germination

Raj: It's amazing what liquor does to guilt.

Quote from the episode The Classified Materials Turbulence

Howard: Ok, now, this is an exact duplicate of The Wolowitz Solid Waste Disposal System, as deployed on the International Space Station.
Raj: Don't you mean the Wolowitz Solid Waste Distribution System?

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Raj: Well, uh, to paraphrase Shakespeare, "It's better to have loved and lost than to stay home every night and download increasingly shameful pornography."

Quote from the episode The Roommate Transmogrification

Penny: What do you mean new roommate? What happened to Leonard?
Sheldon: The same thing that happened to Homo Erectus. He was replaced by a superior species.
Raj: I'm the new homo in town.

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