Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 70 of 70

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Quote from the episode The Allowance Evaporation

Raj: This morning, I fired my dog walker.
Howard: Oh. How's the dog gonna go to the bathroom?
Raj: Uh, I gave her an Imodium. That's tomorrow's problem.

Quote from the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Raj: We're being ridiculous. There's no way a woman that attractive is trying to seduce Sheldon Cooper.
Howard: You done trying to make yourself feel better?
Raj: No. I haven't played the race card yet.

Quote from the episode The Matrimonial Metric

Howard: Uh-oh. They gave us plain rice instead of fried rice.
Raj: Well, no fair! I SoulCycled this morning. I'm entitled to a pile of fat rice.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Leonard: Well, I have to finish writing it before they can make it into a movie, and I still have a few things to figure out.
Howard: You should talk to Bernadette. Since she's been on bed rest, she's binged, like, every detective show in the world.
Raj: Oh, there was a funny detective show in India called Karamchand. He had an assistant named Kitty, and he was always saying, "Shut up, Kitty!" Sounds less mean if you say it in Hindi and don't think of women as having feelings.

Quote from the episode The Neonatal Nomenclature

Sheldon: Yeah, I like the name Elliott. That wasn't on my list, but I like it.
Raj: We've heard your names. They're ridiculous. And I have a cousin named Dilip.

Quote from the episode The Gates Excitation

Howard: We're not doing anything wrong. We're just hanging out in a hotel lobby. Plenty of people do that: businessmen, high-end prostitutes.
Raj: That's a fun new game, CEO or Ho.

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Raj: We should name it.
Howard: The drone, or your stupid robot show?
Raj: The drone. The show's already got a name, General Bot-spital.

Quote from the episode The Sibling Realignment

Howard: So, how was your date?
Raj: It was going well until my eye dripped in her latte.

Quote from the episode The Monetary Insufficiency

Raj: You just have to wait for science to catch up or technology to get cheaper. Think about, uh, DVD players. They used to cost, like, a thousand dollars, but just the other day I used one to smash a bug.

Quote from the episode The Sibling Realignment

Raj: Hey, why didn't you invite him in the first place?
Sheldon: You don't know what it was like growing up with him.
Raj: I get it; I grew up with lots of brothers. My brother Adoot was especially mean.
Leonard: Really? I've never heard you mention Adoot.
Raj: Yeah, sure I have. He's the one who left the door open when we were kids, and my pet mongoose ran away. Stupid Adoot.

Quote from the episode The Paintball Scattering

Anu: This should be fun. I've never played before.
Raj: Oh, fair warning, it can get pretty ugly out there.
Anu: Okay, well, remember, I'm your fiancee.
Raj: Oh, I remember. Do you?

Quote from the episode The D & D Vortex

Sheldon: Raj, do you have something to add?
Raj: You brought shame upon yourself and your family. It's not funny, but it's true.

Quote from the episode The Monetary Insufficiency

Howard: Hey. Missed you guys at the faculty mixer.
Raj: Ah, you should have been there; dessert was bananas. Sorry, that was misleading. The dessert was pie, but the pie was bananas. Actually, the pie was cherry, but the taste of the pie was bananas.

Quote from the episode The Change Constant

Amy: Raj, please, not now.
Raj: Hey, what's wrong?
Amy: My picture's all over the Internet, and I look terrible.
Raj: No. Let me see. Well, that is an unfortunate angle. But who cares? You just won the Nobel. You should be proud of this moment.
Amy: I know I shouldn't care about how I look, and I never thought I did. It-It's stupid and shallow, but I just can't help it. Am I really this frumpy?
Raj: No. No, you are a beautiful woman. By the way, if you're not happy with those pictures, then make some changes. Get a haircut, new clothes, new glasses, big glasses - No glasses, then you won't be able to see those pictures.

Quote from the episode The Large Hadron Collision

Sheldon: This is incredible! I'm so happy, I'm not even going to question their judgment in picking you. I'm just going to run home and start packing.
Raj: Why wouldn't you take Penny?
Leonard: I am taking Penny.
Raj: Oh. Well, then I anticipate an awkward situation when you get home.

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