Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 206 of 209

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Quote from the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Penny: I always say that when one door closes, another one opens.
Sheldon: No it doesn't. Not unless the two doors are connected by relays or there are motion sensors involved. Or if the first door closing creates a change of air pressure that acts upon the second door.
Penny: Never mind.

Quote from the episode The Luminous Fish Effect

Sheldon: I'm taking a sabbatical because I won't kowtow to mediocre minds.
Penny: So you got canned, huh?
Sheldon: Theoretical physicists do not get 'canned'. But yeah.

Quote from the episode The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

Sheldon: (to Leonard, who has decided to give up on Penny) Well, at least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted, smoldering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her and analyze the data so you don't crash into Geek Mountain again.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: I believe the appropriate metaphor here involves a river of excrement and a Native American water vessel without any means of propulsion.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: Rock - Paper - Scissors - Lizard - Spock

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Sheldon: Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid. I'm just inferring that this is a couch, because the evidence suggests the coffee table's having a tiny garage sale.

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Leonard: Do you have any ideas?
Sheldon: Yes, but they all involve a Green Lantern and a Power Ring.

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Leonard: Sheldon, this is not your home!
Sheldon: This isn't anyone's 'home'. This is a swirling vortex of entropy.

Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis

Leonard: Most people don't sort their breakfast cereal numerically by fiber content.
Sheldon: Excuse me, but I think we've both found that helpful at times.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: I'm sorry but I'm not going to watch the Clone Wars TV Series until I've seen the Clone Wars movie. I prefer to let George Lucas disappoint me in the order he intended.

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Sheldon: Is my hamburger medium-well?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Dill slices not sweet?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Individual relish packets?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Onion rings?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Extra-breading?
Leonard: I asked.
Sheldon: What did they say?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Did you protest?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Vociferously?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Well then what took you so long?

Quote from the episode The Barbarian Sublimation

Sheldon: I'm surprised you struck out with Penny. Apparently she's a big 'ol five.

Quote from the episode Pilot

Penny: So, what do you guys do for fun around here?
Sheldon: Well, today we tried masturbating for money.

Quote from the episode The Codpiece Topology

Sheldon: Oh Mario, if only I could control everyone the way I control you. Hop, you little plumber. Hop, hop hop!

Quote from the episode The Barbarian Sublimation

Sheldon: Danger! Danger!

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