Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 208 of 239

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Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Penny: What I'm saying is, Leonard might be different in a good way. And obviously, my usual choices have not worked out so well.
Sheldon: Your last choice worked out for Koothrappali. He got a free iPod.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Penny: Leonard might be home, can we talk in my apartment?
Sheldon: We're not done?
Penny: No!
Sheldon: Eh, why not? We're already through the looking glass anyway.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Sheldon: Howard, I'm gonna need another mandarin lesson, I obviously didn't make my point with those people.
Howard: For God's sake, Sheldon, if you don't like the tangerine chicken, don't order the tangerine chicken.
Sheldon: I like tangerine chicken, I'm just not getting tangerine chicken.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Sheldon: (Speaking Chinese to Leonard).
Howard: You just called Leonard a syphillitic donkey.
Sheldon: My apologies, Leonard. I'm only as good as my teacher.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: I'm a superior genetic mutation, an improvement on the existing mediocre stock.
Missy: And what do you mean "mediocre stock"?!
Sheldon: That would be you.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: Why does everyone suddenly wanna talk to me alone? Usually nobody wants to be alone with me.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Missy: (Talking to the guys) He was trying to build some sort of armed robot to keep me out of his room.
Sheldon: Made necessary by her insistence on going into my room.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: Tell Mom that I currently weigh 165 pounds and that I'm having regular bowel movements.

Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy

Sheldon: How would one measure a sense of humor? A humormometer?

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Sheldon: Oh, no, not Morlocks, not flesh eating Morlocks! Help!

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Penny: What the hell's going on?
Sheldon: You hypocrite.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Little Miss Grown-Ups-Don't-Play-With-Toys! If I went into that apartment right now, would I not find Beanie Babies? Are you not an accumulator of Care Bears and My Little Ponies? And who is that Japanese feline I see frolicking on your shorts? Hello, Hello Kitty!

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Penny: Oh, please, it's not a time machine, if anything, it looks like something Elton John would drive through the Everglades.
Sheldon: It only moves in time, it would be worse than useless in a swamp.

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Leonard: How are we gonna get it upstairs?
Sheldon: If we take the dish off, it might fit in the elevator.
Leonard: Yes, but the elevator's been broken for two years.
Sheldon: I've been meaning to ask you, do you think we should make a call about that?
Howard: Not necessary, I have a master's in engineering. I remotely repair satellites on a regular basis. I troubleshoot satellite payloads. When the Mars Rover started pulling to the left, I performed a front-end alignment from 62 million miles away. (Pushing button on elevator) Nah, that baby's broken.

Quote from the episode The Nerdvana Annihilation

Sheldon: Well, this sandwich is an unmitigated disaster. I asked for turkey and roast beef with lettuce and swiss on whole wheat.
Raj: What did they give you?
Sheldon: Turkey and Roast beef with swiss and lettuce on whole wheat.
*The guys look at Sheldon*
Sheldon: It's the right ingredients but in the wrong order. In a proper sandwich, the cheese is adjacent to the bread to create a moisture barrier against the lettuce. They might as well have dragged this thing through a car wash.

Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture

Gablehauser: AA, I need your official answer.
Sheldon: Well, it's not what he said.
Gablehauser: Then what is it?
Sheldon: I want a different question.
Gablehauser: You can't have a different question.
Sheldon: Formal Protest!
Gablehauser: Denied!
Sheldon: Informal Protest!
Gablehauser: Denied! I need your official answer.
Sheldon: No, I decline to provide one.
Gablehauser: Well, that's too bad, because the answer your teammate gave was correct.
Sheldon: That's your opinion.

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