Doctor Wolcott: Dr. Cooper. Uh, who are these people?
Sheldon: Oh, these are my friends. I wrote about them in my letter.
Doctor Wolcott: Oh, letter? I didn't get a letter.
Sheldon: Well, that's because I just sent it this morning, you know? So score one for linear time.

Sheldon: Oh, um, no offense, Dr. Wolcott, but I'm not sure this makes any sense.
Doctor Wolcott: That's because I've written it all backwards.
Sheldon: Wow. That's "wow" backwards.

Sheldon: Hmm. I still don't get it.
Doctor Wolcott: Well, plus the numbers are letters and the letters are numbers.
Sheldon: Oh. I love him!

Sheldon: It is amazing how much he's accomplished by isolating himself from the distractions of day-to-day life.
Leonard: Okay, please don't tell me you want to live like this.
Sheldon: See, that's the strange thing. I don't. What is wrong with me? Why don't I want this? Look at how cool it all is.
Howard: Nothing is wrong with you. You have friends, you have a fiancee, you have a full life.

Sheldon: It is fitting that you got into tires, because you are tiresome.
Leonard: Sheldon, come on.
Sheldon: Was that too mean?
Leonard: No, not too mean, not too good either.

Raj: Hey, uh, Penny, do you want to check this out?
Penny: Yeah, sure.
Raj: All right, just, uh, look through here, and if you want to take a picture, just push that button.
Penny: Okay. Oh, what is that?
Sheldon: (gasps) Is it Mercury? I'm really jonesing for Mercury.
Amy: I think it's a little early for Mercury to be visible yet.
Sheldon: Playing hard to get. I like that in a planet.

Stuart: Hey, guys. That tweet actually got people to come in. Isn't that great?
Sheldon: No. I liked the way the store was before.
Howard: You mean empty and sad?
Sheldon: Yes, it was perfect. Like a funeral home that sells Pokemon cards.

Sheldon: [turning to the guy next to him] Hey, Howard, did you see that? (shrieks)
Howard: I'm over here, Sheldon.
Sheldon: That was a close one. I almost went home with that guy.

Howard: You doing okay? Do we need to go?
Sheldon: No, I'm fine. I admit all these people did take me by surprise at first, but I've learned that I can accept change.
Howard: S-Since when?
Sheldon: I managed it when Amy switched her shampoo from Prell to Prell For Oily Hair. Hmm? Although I do miss the way her head used to slide off the pillow.

Sheldon: Oh, and it turns out Denise is also really excited for Dan Slott's run on Iron Man, because he was her favorite Spider-Man writer, too.
Amy: How about that?
Sheldon: Oh! And guess who goes to art school right here in Pasadena.
Amy: Hmm. I don't know. Denise?
Sheldon: You're a good guesser, Amy. Not as good as Denise, though. She thought I would like this comic, Arrowsmith, and she was right.

Sheldon: Why are you reading a comic book?
Amy: Denise recommended it to me. It's the Rebirth Omnibus. She thought it would be a good entry point for me into the DC Universe, and I have to say I really do like-
Sheldon: You know, Amy, Amy, I've talked a lot about comic books lately, can we talk about something else?

Leonard: Look, imagine you maintained a friendship with someone you had sex with, but you were free to date whoever you wanted.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, I can't imagine any of that.

Leonard: Alright, back to the game.
Sheldon: I believe it's my turn, you may begin your questions whenever you're ready.
Raj: Are you Spock?
Sheldon: I don't like this game.

Penny: Hang on, I think the emergency key is around here somewhere.
Sheldon: We have a bowl. Our keys go in a bowl. You should get a bowl.
Penny: So, how did the beautiful mind of Sheldon Cooper forget his key in the first place.
Sheldon: I left them in the bowl.

Sheldon: So, how was your day?
Penny: Are you trying to make small talk? Oh, sweetie, you really don't have to.
Sheldon: No, it's the accepted convention. How was your day?
Penny: Well, uh, they shifted my schedule around at the restaurant so my hours are going to be a little different...
Sheldon: I'm sorry, that's not going to interest me at all, just eat.