Amy: Sheldon, go to sleep.
Sheldon: Amy. [tapping her three times] Amy. [tapping her three times] Amy. [tapping her three times]
Amy: You cut that out!
Sheldon: Oh, good, you're up.

Amy: Okay, listen to me. I love working with you, but you have to understand how scary this is for me.
Sheldon: Why?
Amy: Because I don't want to get lost in this relationship. And when you pulled me off my project, it seemed like my biggest fear was coming true, the-the things that are mine are getting subsumed into the things that are ours.
Sheldon: I wouldn't want that to happen, either. Thank you for explaining, and for using the word "subsume," that's one you don't hear enough.

Amy: What are you doing now?
Sheldon: Looking for shoes.
Amy: Why?
Sheldon: When your favorite ghost tells you to do something, you do it.

Sheldon: Oh. Is that watermelon for anybody?
Bernadette: It's for Halley.
Sheldon: Is she gonna eat all of it? God, no wonder she looks like Churchill.

Bernadette: What do you want, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Howard said your feelings were hurt.
Bernadette: Well, Howard's wrong. I don't care if someone makes fun of me.
Sheldon: All right. Apparently I came all this way for nothing. Unless Halley wants to share that watermelon?

Bernadette: You think Amy's the first person to make fun of me for having a squeaky voice? Do you?
Sheldon: I feel like my chance at watermelon is dangling by a thread.

Bernadette: She's not. It's been happening my whole life. And-and she called me out for being mean? Well, I've had to be mean. It's hard to be taken seriously when you're always the smallest person in the room.
Sheldon: I know that. I was in high school when I was nine years old. I tried to tell the other kids that although my physical stature was small, my intellectual stature towered over them. That only seemed to make things worse.

Bernadette: I guess we both had to put up with a lot of crap from people.
Sheldon: I suppose we have. Huh. Maybe you and I are more alike than we thought.
Bernadette: Maybe we are.
Sheldon: Although I'm exceptionally tall, and you're exceptionally-
Bernadette: Sheldon.
Sheldon: You didn't even let me finish.
Bernadette: Fine. Sorry.
Sheldon: Short.

Amy: What do you guys think you're doing?
Raj: We're showing Sheldon Halloween.
Amy: Absolutely not. Sheldon, come home.
Sheldon: But I really want to watch it.
Amy: I know you do, but I am forbidding it.
Sheldon: Oh, man. Sorry, guys.
[in the hallway:]
Sheldon: What took you so long?
Amy: I'm sorry. I just got your text!

Howard: Hey, thank you guys again for helping out yesterday.
Raj: No problem. That was really fun.
Sheldon: It was fun. But I am sore.
Howard: You didn't lift a finger.
Sheldon: No, but I narrated the entire event, and I am paying for it today.

Leonard: Gentlemen.
Raj: Hey.
Sheldon: Hi.
Howard: Leonard, do I detect a little swagger in your step?
Leonard: Mm, possibly.
Sheldon: Well, stop. It doesn't suit you.

Leonard: How do you not care what people think of you?
Sheldon: It's easy. I mean, not "beating you at chess" easy, but what is?

Raj: Hey, guys, before Anu gets here, can I talk about the seating situation? I really don't want her to sit on the floor.
Sheldon: Oh. No problem. Bernadette, floor.
Bernadette: Hey!
Howard: Yeah, you really can't make my wife sit on the floor.
Sheldon: Fine. Howard, floor.

Sheldon: So, how does this work with in-laws? Am I supposed to be calling you Dad? Because I don't want to.
Mr. Fowler: You don't have to.
Sheldon: Oh, thanks, Larry. Ooh. That doesn't sound right. Maybe I should pick a vegetable for you.

Howard: What are you guys up to?
Sheldon: Oh, father-in-law, son-in-law bonding. It's going great. Look at what he bought me at the train store. (blows whistle) Yeah, it sounded louder in the car.