Stuart Bloom Quotes Page 11 of 15

Searching Search quotes

Quote from the episode The Matrimonial Momentum

Bernadette: What happened? They just got married.
Howard: I don't know. It's a mess. They had a huge fight in Vegas.
Bernadette: You think they'll break up?
Howard: I don't know. Sounds pretty bad. Penny's back in her apartment all by herself.
Stuart: Really?

Quote from the episode The Commitment Determination

Stuart: I don't want to rush you, but I'm closing a little early tonight.
Raj: Ooh, hot date?
Stuart: Uh, no. I overheard Bernadette tell Howard she was making him a meatloaf, and you don't have to not ask me twice.

Quote from the episode The Commitment Determination

Raj: Hey, you should totally get it. In fact, I'll buy it for you.
Stuart: Sold!
Emily: Raj, you don't have to do that.
Stuart: Too late! No returns!

Quote from the episode The Commitment Determination

*Stuart's phone rings*
Howard: You need to take that?
Stuart: It's just my dad, probably calling to wish me a happy birthday. I'll call him back. You were saying?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Combustion

Raj: How old is this Jell-O?
Stuart: Well, it's carrots, so I'm gonna say very.

Quote from the episode The Leftover Thermalization

Penny: Wow, it looks really pretty in here.
Stuart: Yeah, turns out half a dozen Menorahs really sets a mood.

Quote from the episode The Leftover Thermalization

Leonard: Stuart, have you thought about what you'd do if Howard sells the house?
Stuart: And there goes the mood.

Quote from the episode The Leftover Thermalization

Howard: Certainly a lot more women are reading comic books now.
Stuart: It's true. In the store, I had to put a seat on the toilet.

Quote from the episode The Comic Book Store Regeneration

Stuart: I can't believe she's gone. That woman took me in. If it wasn't for her, I would have been homeless.
Amy: One of us would have taken you in.
Stuart: Yeah, I don't recall any offers. But you know what, I'm glad it worked out the way it did, because I got to know this wonderful person.

Quote from the episode The Prom Equivalency

Stuart: So I met Jeanie at your Aunt Gladys's. She passed me the Manischewitz, I took one look at this punim, and almost plotzed on the kugel.

Quote from the episode The Status Quo Combustion

Stuart: I don't mean to be rude, Sheldon, but my life is kinda falling apart right now.

Quote from the episode The Status Quo Combustion

Sheldon: Can you break a twenty?
Stuart: No, I only have hundreds.
Sheldon: You know what. I don't always recognize sarcasm, but I do right now and I don't appreciate it. I'm sorry for your loss, but you're not the only one whose day's been a disaster.

Quote from the episode The Status Quo Combustion

*As Stuart moves a box, a piece of the ceiling falls down*
Stuart: That could have killed me. ... Can't catch a break.

Quote from the episode The Status Quo Combustion

Howard: Don't take this the wrong way, but did you do this for the insurance money?
Stuart: No! God, you sound like the police, the fireman, my parents, my therapist and the insurance company.

Quote from the episode The Status Quo Combustion

Howard: Hang on, I know a place where you could you stay and earn some money at the same time.
Stuart: Great!
Howard: I just have to warn you: it will involve humiliation, degradation and verbal abuse.
Stuart: So, what's the catch?

Showing quotes 151 to 165 of 213Sort by  popularity | date added | episode