Zack Johnson Quotes Page 2 of 4

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Quote from the episode The Thanksgiving Decoupling

Zack: You know what they say. Happy wife - Happy life. Let's eat!

Quote from the episode The Lunar Excitation

Zack: Cool, it's gonna be in 3-D!

Quote from the episode The Thanksgiving Decoupling

Penny: Look, Zack. Come on. You know neither of us thought this was real. I mean we were married by an Elvis impersonator.
Zack: Of course it was an impersonator. We could never afford a real Elvis.

Quote from the episode The Fermentation Bifurcation

Zack: Penny?
Penny: Oh, Zack, hi. You guys remember Zack?
Howard: Yeah, hey, buddy.
Amy: Hello.
Raj: Hey.
Zack: Hey, did you two get married?
Penny: We did.
Leonard: Yeah, mmm-hmm.
Zack: To each other?
Penny: Yes.
Zack: Cool. 'cause other than when you broke up with him and dated me, then broke up with me, and then dated me one more time before going back to him, I was always rooting for you two.

Quote from the episode The Justice League Recombination

Wolowitz: Okay, the good news is, we have a Wonder Woman.
Sheldon: Oh.
Koothrappali: Yes.
Sheldon: What's the bad news?
Wolowitz: Superman probably isn't getting laid tonight.
Zack: Aw, damn.

Quote from the episode The Justice League Recombination

Stuart: So are you guys coming to my New Year's Eve costume party?
Sheldon: Of course. We're coming as the Justice League of America.
Howard: Switching it up from last year when we came as the Justice League of America.
Sheldon: To that point, it occurs to me that we might have an opportunity to finally snare Best Group Costume if we shore up our weak link, which is clearly Leonard as Superman.
Leonard: Hey, I got new boots this year. Guaranteed to add three inches.
Sheldon: That's sad. Let's ask ourselves, is there anyone we know who would make a more manly and convincing son of Krypton?
Stuart: Than than Leonard in high-heeled boots? Howard's mother in high-heeled boots?
Sheldon: I was thinking specifically of the gentleman over there moving his lips as he enjoys the latest exploits of Betty and Veronica.
Leonard: Zack?
Howard: He is the only person we know with actual muscles.
Leonard: You can't replace me with Zack.
Sheldon: Why not? Penny did it.
Howard: Yeah, she seems happier. Why wouldn't we be?
Zack: Score. I got an Archie, Betty and Veronica, and a Jughead. All set for my weekend number twos.
Sheldon: Congratulations. Zack, how would you like to be Superman?
Zack: I don't know, sounds like a lot of responsibility.

Quote from the episode The Justice League Recombination

Zack: (At Penny's door) Babe, open up.
Penny: I'm not talking to you.
Zack: Then who are you talking to? Babe?

Quote from the episode The Thanksgiving Decoupling

Zack: It's all right. I didn't have anything going on. Plus, Penny told me we're married, and Thanksgiving is a time to be with family.

Quote from the episode The Fermentation Bifurcation

Raj: Hey, dude, you're killing me with Claire.
Zack: What are you talking about?
Raj: I mean, come on, look at you. You're classically handsome, you've got a swimmer's body. Next to you, I look like me.

Quote from the episode The Fermentation Bifurcation

Raj: Yeah, okay, just do me a favor and stop talking about how great Claire is.
Zack: Anything for you, my little foreign friend.

Quote from the episode The Fermentation Bifurcation

Zack: I see what you're saying. She's not so great.
Raj: Don't listen to him. He says crazy things all the time. Uh, watch. Marco.
Zack: Polo.

Quote from the episode The Fermentation Bifurcation

Raj: So, uh, what are you guys talking about?
Claire: Your friends were just telling me about all the other girls you're dating.
Raj: Why would you do that? I specifically asked you not to do that.
Penny: We didn't.
Amy: You just did.
Zack: Wow. Maybe none of you guys are smart.

Quote from the episode The Cognition Regeneration

Penny: Uh, what's new?
Zack: Oh, tons of stuff. Put artificial grass in my backyard, got engaged, had a scary mole that turned out to be Sharpie.
Penny: Well, congratulations.
Zack: That's what my dermatologist said.
Penny: No, on getting engaged, good for you.
Zack: Oh, thanks.

Quote from the episode The Cognition Regeneration

Penny: Oh, that's a nice offer.
Zack: You know, we'd make a great team. Or as we say in the menu business, I can't do this without Me N U.
Penny: Right, 'cause it spells "menu."
Zack: Yeah, right? It's funny. I got a lot of menu jokes, but that's my favorite.

Quote from the episode The Alien Parasite Hypothesis

Zack: Hey, Penny, how's it going?
Penny: Hey, Zack, what are you doing here?
Zack: My dad's company prints the menus for this place. I'm just dropping off some new ones, laminated. Makes 'em easier to clean if people throw up on 'em. Guess how I got the idea?
Penny: Yeah, I got it, I got it.

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